Blue Dragon

Weapons.’
    He threw himself down again and pulled his chair closer to the table. Ah Yat presented him with the tea and he poured for himself. ‘I am a creature of my word, and it was an accident,’ he said. He turned to my parents. ‘Has she always been this impossible?’
    ‘You are absolutely the scruffiest Immortal I have ever met,’ I huffed. ‘I’m surprised your Celestial Form is so tidy. Your armour doesn’t have any holes in it. Why do your clothes?’
    ‘That is extremely good coming from you,’ John said mildly. ‘Look at your jeans.’
    I glanced down at my jeans and felt my face redden. I pulled a chair out and sat next to my father. ‘I didn’t know that was there.’
    ‘My Lord Mr Donahoe, my Lady Mrs Donahoe, what may I prepare for you?’ Ah Yat said.
    ‘Just Brendan, and if you have any cornflakes that’d be great. Otherwise, whatever’s going,’ my father said.
    ‘Just some fruit and toast, please,’ my mother said.
    Ah Yat nodded, smiled, and disappeared. Both my parents jumped.
    ‘No cornflakes,’ I said. ‘She’s gone to buy you some.’
    ‘Speaking of armour, I must have some made for you,’ John said.
    ‘Don’t worry about it. Right now, every attack’s an ambush so there’s no point,’ I said. ‘And how come I came back with clothes on last night? I shouldn’t have been able to conjure them.’
    ‘What are you talking about?’ my father said.
    ‘When we transform, we lose the clothes. Of course,’ John said.
    ‘The Tiger loves it,’ I cut in. ‘Shocking exhibitionist.’
    ‘ Anyway ,’ John said, glaring at me, ‘we conjure the clothes when we return to human form.’
    ‘But I shouldn’t have been able to do that,’ I said.
    ‘Obviously the Serpent in you could,’ John said. ‘The stone was right: we must start some more advanced training with you. Who knows what you’ll be able to do? Try something now,’ he said, sitting straighter. ‘Try calling me.’
    I thought hard at him.
    ‘Nothing,’ he said, sounding disappointed.
    I shrugged. ‘Not surprising. The snake’s probably hiding right now.’
    Ah Yat appeared with the cornflakes and placed the breakfast things on the table in front of my parents.
    ‘Thanks,’ my father said and poured the cereal. ‘How old are you, John?’
    ‘I have no idea,’ John said.
    ‘You look about forty or forty-five,’ my mother said.
    ‘Yeah,’ I said. ‘Far too old for me.’
    ‘I’m probably in the region of four to four and a half thousand years old,’ John said amiably. ‘I have no recollection of being born. I don’t know exactly when I gained consciousness. I joined with the Serpent about three and a half thousand years ago.’
    My parents stared at him, speechless.
    ‘About three thousand years ago the human form was Raised and I was promoted to Dark Emperor,’ John said, almost to himself. ‘Celestial General. That sort of thing.’
    ‘And you still haven’t grown up,’ I said. ‘Tea, Ceylon. Toast with peanut butter, please, Ah Yat.’
    Ah Yat disappeared again.
    ‘Must have run out of peanut butter,’ I said. ‘Don’t know why all the demons like it so much. Remind me later to ask her for a shopping list—we can order in bulk on the internet, have it delivered, and she can stop flitting around like that. People at the supermarket will notice.’
    ‘She probably changes her form if she has to go twice in a row,’ John said.
    ‘Eat,’ I said, gesturing towards my parents. ‘You’ll get used to it.’
    ‘Why black?’ my mother said. ‘You only wear black. Everything. And Tiger the other night—he called you a Black Turtle. What was that about?’
    ‘You know the Suzy Wong reference?’ I said, and she nodded. ‘Well, Black Turtle is Cantonese street slang for pimp. The turtle in general is renowned for its…’ I grinned at John, ‘ behaviour , and there are a lot of nasty insults surrounding it. It’s not a good idea to say the word anywhere near anybody.’
    Ah Yat appeared with a jar of peanut butter in her hand. She put it on the table in front of me.
    ‘Did you pay for that?’ I said.
    Ah Yat didn’t reply; she just turned and busied herself at the sink.
    ‘You dishonour us, Ah Yat,’ I said. ‘Later, you will go back there, pick up one of these, pay for it and put it back on the shelf, and that is an order.’
    ‘I’m a turtle egg,’ John said.
    Ah Yat silently collapsed over the sink.
    ‘See?’ I said. ‘He just called himself a