Born 01 - Born

like I want her to be my lover, but I wouldn’t protest more kisses. They were nice.
    "Thinking about me?"
    I look up at Will. I shake my head and blush more.
    He still looks pissed. "My brother?"
    I frown.
    He shakes his head. "Then I don’t even want to know who else you’ve been kissing."
    I am tired and still feel sick. It's only just dusk. I get up and leave. He grabs my arm, not realizing it's been shot.
    I wince and cry out.
    "Emma, are you okay?"
    I nod but cradle the arm in my other one. "I got shot."
    He sighs and pulls me into him. "Stop pushing me away, Emma. Let me take care of you." He lifts me up and carries me away from the noise. There is so much of it. I notice a buzz in my ears when we are far away from it.
    I lie perfectly still in his arms and let myself enjoy my damsel in distress moment. He makes me want to act feeble and give into it. I wonder for a brief second if Star used to be a competent girl and if he ruined her. I tighten up.
    "What?"
    "Nothing."
    He set me down on a log. "What? I felt you tense."
    "It's nothing. I was just wondering something."
    "And that was?"
    "Did Star used to be a normal girl or has she always been the puppy dog that follows you around? Did you ruin her?"
    He laughs and rubs his eyes. He looks exhausted. "Oh, Emma. You drive me insane. Can't you just leave it alone? It's private."
    My brow knits. "I can, yeah." I climb off the log and walk away. He grabs my arm again, and I cry out.
    He winces "Sorry. I keep forgetting."
    I mutter, "Yeah, I know exactly how that feels. I watch you sing and be sweet and I forget what you're really like."
    He looks like he's holding his breath, but then he speaks. "She was raped savagely. Imagine the worst thing you can think of happening to a fifteen-year-old girl. I was escaping and I saw them. I tell everyone I met her at the breeder farms but that’s not entirely the truth of it. She was in the back of the truck with four of them in the parking lot. There were a few of them back there. It was the most disturbing thing I've ever seen."
    I shiver and gag a little. The women who were kept behind. Their faces will haunt me the rest of my life. I remember them sitting at the back of the truck. I remember the screams.
    "I saved her. I saved them. That's it."
    "How?" I feel like an ass. I wish I could take it back.
    "I killed them. I killed all four of them. She's been very, uh, well, grateful ever since."
    Grateful…Gross… "Grateful?"
    "She thinks I'm her knight in shining armor. I take care of her. She goes where I go. She cooks for me and stuff. Grateful."
    Angry words fly from my lips. "She's grateful. That's disgusting. She doesn’t act like any victim I've ever seen. The women I've seen who were raped are timid and shy. She acts like a whore. She's always half naked and hanging off you."
    "Emma!"
    I know it's the wrong thing to say, but it's the way it seems to me. No one talks about the things that are right in front of them.
    He takes one of his giant steps and holds my arms. I don’t cry out. I tremble. His fingers dig right into the wounds on me.
    He shakes me slightly. "Why would you say such a horrid thing? If I ever hear you say that again…look at me."
    I don’t. Tears flood my eyes. His fingers scrape my gunshot.
    He tilts my face but I avert my eyes. I break from his grip and run. I head back to the camp.
    He grabs at me, but Leo has had enough of his manhandling and so have I.
    When his hand grabs my non-wounded arm this time, Leo dives at him and knocks him to the ground. He growls at Will's throat.
    I wrap my hand around my wound to try to stop the warm liquid running down my arm, where Mona has butterflied it. His eyes notice the red liquid seeping through my fingers. I see his regret.
    "I just can't stop hurting you." His words sound broken somehow. They don’t make complete sounds. "You just make me so mad."
    Through the tears, I don't see him clearly. I still see the man I am madly in love with. I still hear his haunting voice filling the smoky forest. "I think you need a girl like Star. She always needs you to rescue her. I'm not the right girl for you. I think that's the thing I like the most about your brother. He just wants to be with me. He doesn’t want to try to run me or save me. Do me a favor when we get to the camp, and just stay there. I don’t want or need your help."
    For the first time, I see pain on his face, real pain.
    I don’t feel the satisfaction I think I will. The ache in my