Days of Love and Blood

his hips.
    “When he got sick I called his mom, before the phones went out. I told her that he was sick. She didn’t come. That cold, sick bitch didn’t come even when I told her how sick he was. And she lived in the same fuckin’ town.”
    Cooper squinted at me and then bowed his head. He tried to speak a few times but was choked by his own sobs.
    “Cameron died in my arms,” he finally said. His voice was softer now, but tinged with horrific pain. A steady stream of tears rolled down his cheeks. “My boy. My son. My beautiful son died in my arms. He left me.”
    “Cooper. I’m so sorry. I had no idea.” Ronan lifted his head up and turned around. He struggled a bit and pushed me away, letting me know that he wanted to get down. I watched as Ronan walked over and put his tiny arms around Cooper’s waist, resting his head on Cooper’s stomach. Cooper inhaled and drew back his lips in grief. He lightly put his hand on Ronan’s head and the other on his back. Only a few seconds later Ronan pulled back and took his hand, leading Cooper into the house. I walked in behind them, head hanging low.
    Ronan led Cooper upstairs while I remained down in the kitchen. I needed coffee. Cassie was sitting at the table watching me with her normal sheepish face.
    “Are you okay?” she asked.
    “Yeah. I’m fine. I just made a mistake.”
    “Was he gonna hurt you?”
    “No, of course not.”
    “You’re not afraid of him?”
    “No, Cassie. I’m not afraid of him. He just got mad at me. He’s been through a lot. He has a temper but he wouldn’t hurt me.”
    “He broke Johnson’s nose.”
    “I know. But he wouldn’t hurt me. He wouldn’t hurt you, either. Or Ronan.”
    “Did he sleep here last night?”
    “Yes, Cassie. He did.”
    “I woke up last night and went downstairs for a little while. To read and have something to eat. I didn’t see him.”
    “He slept in my room, Cassie,” I sighed. For someone so shy, she was doing well at being nosy. “But it wasn’t like that,” I added.
    A half-hour later I called up the stairs and asked if either of them wanted breakfast. A minute later, both Cooper and Ronan came down. While Ronan sat down at the table, Cooper mumbled a short goodbye and left the house. I heard his truck come to life and then he was gone.
    “So, what did you bring Cooper upstairs for?” I asked while pouring his cereal.
    “I tried to give him the arrowhead back. It was his son’s. It was Cameron’s. He was the daddy. He should have it.”
    “That was awful sweet of you babe. Did he take it?”
    “No. He said that Cameron would have wanted me to have it. He said that I look just like him. Like we were twins,” he said with a toothy grin.
    “What else did you talk about?”
    “I told him about Daddy. I showed him pictures, too. I told him about that time Dad took me fishing. Just me and him. Remember? When our canoe tipped and we came home all wet?”
    “I do,” I said with a laugh.
    “And then I told him about all of the times Dad would do all of the same things for me like Cooper did for Cameron.”
    “ That was sweet, babe. Did it make him upset?”
    “No. He was okay. Then I asked him if he hated you.”
    “Oh.”
    “He said he didn’t and that he was just mad. He said he gets mad a lot lately, but he didn’t used to. I said that was good because you’re a really good mommy.”
    “And you’re a really good Ronan.” I cupped the back of his neck and brought his forehead to mine. I was so lucky to have him. The thought broke my heart for Cooper.

Goodbye, Hello
    Ronan’s room was already painted in blue and green pastels but we never got around to setting up his crib. We thought we had plenty of time but our son decided to make his grand entrance six weeks early. He had been sleeping for the past two weeks in a borrowed bassinette next to our bed.
    When Ritchie left for work that morning, he bent over to kiss me goodbye on the forehead. I was too busy to look up, sitting on the floor of Ronan’s room with a screwdriver in one hand and the directions in the other. When Ritchie came home for lunch I was still in Ronan’s room, taking the crib apart after discovering that I had installed one side backwards.
    “I told you to just wait for me to do it.”
    “I want it done now.”
    “Just leave it, Carson. I promise , I’ll do it when I get home. How long have you been at this?” I snickered and then gave him a pretend glare accompanied with a flash display of