Doctor at Sea

better climb in a colectivo.’
    ‘A quick one in old Mother Whitehead’s first,’ Archer insisted.’ After all, it’s known to every Liverpool fireman since steam came in.’
    We had a couple of drinks described guardedly as Special Cocktails, and ate bits of chopped meat, nuts, mussels, cheese, and olives from the small plates the citizens of Buenos Aires expect to be handed with their drinks.
    ‘On me,’ Hornbeam said firmly, pulling out a fifty-peso note. ’Now let’s go down town and have a steak.’
    We went to the broad, bright Avenida Corrientes, the Broadway of B.A. In one of the grill rooms we sat down and ate steaks three inches thick.
    ‘Nothing like nourishment,’ Hornbeam observed.’ I’m going to have another of these. How about you, Doc?’
    I shook my head, as my mouth was too full to speak.
    ‘You’ll want it in a few weeks’ time when you’re treating yourself to a nice spaghetti on toast. How about a bottle of Argentine wine? It’s not bad. All on me, you blokes.’
    We rose uneasily from the table when Hornbeam paid the bill. By now his already generous feelings towards the evening were accentuated by heavy feeding.
    ‘I’m going to show you boys the town,’ he said handsomely.’ Everything’s my treat. Where shall we go to?’
    ‘How about El Nidito?’ Archer suggested. ‘Or L’Atelier?’
    ‘There’s a joint I used to know round the corner,’ Hornbeam said, scratching his forehead.’ Little redhead in there plays the guitar.’
    He was delighted to find the bar was still there, though, reasonably enough, the redhead wasn’t. It was a small, dim place with a band playing sambas in the corner and a tall girl caressing a microphone not much thinner than herself.
    ‘Lovely grub!’ Hornbeam said with relish.’ What’s it to be? Scotch?’
    There was no Scotch but they gave us the locally distilled whisky, which tasted like an old-fashioned carminative mixture. Trail got into earnest conversation with the girl behind the bar, who came from Lytham St Annes, and I sat wondering what the whisky was doing to my gastric lining.
    ‘I’ve had this place,’ Hornbeam said impatiently after a few minutes. ’Let’s move on.’
    ‘But we’ve only just arrived.’
    ‘It’s too quiet. Come on, blokes. It’s my party, so I can take it anywhere.’
    We went to a good many bars. They all offered the same - darkness, sambas, local whisky, and a girl behind the bar who came from some spot comparable to Lytham.
    ‘It’s half-past one,’ I said to Archer later. ’Doesn’t anyone go to sleep in B.A.?’
    ‘Things are only beginning. They go on like this all night.’
    ‘They must be a tougher race than we are. Apart from the hours, they seem to put up with their own whisky.’
    Hornbeam was seized with a final inspiration.
    ‘Let’s go to the Saratoga, boys,’ he announced.
    ‘That’s a posh do,’ Trail told him dubiously.’ It’s an
    * expensive joint, particularly at this hour of the night.’
    ‘Only the best is good enough for us,’ Hornbeam insisted.’ Saratoga next stop. I want to see the dancing girls.’
    We found a cab and drove down the street to the Saratoga. It was a class above the bars and night clubs we had been to - a small silk-lined place with two bands, a tiny dance floor, and a stage. Hornbeam strode in and demanded a table at the front.
    ‘This is more like it!’ he said contentedly. ’I’m fed up with slumming.’
    He ordered some champagne.
    I looked around me and saw it was certainly more fortunate in its clientele than the other places we had visited. The tone was marred only by our party in which Hornbeam was now leaning back in his chair, clapping his hands, and demanding’ Bring on the fat women!’
    ‘There aren’t any here, are there?’ I asked Archer.
    ‘You wait, Doc,’ he said. ‘Three blokes can’t sit down alone anywhere south of Panama without something turning up.’
    He was right. A good-looking blonde in a white evening gown sat on the chair beside me.
    ‘You buy me a t’rink, no?’ she said.
    The waiter had already appeared and brought her a thimbleful of red liquid in a liqueur glass. He also brought a green counter, which he handed to her. This she placed in her handbag.
    ‘I’d better put you wise,’ Archer said across the table. ‘Out here you buy the coloured water and she gets the commission. If you can last out all four you go home with her buckshee.’
    ‘I don’t think I can last out the