Dust of Dreams

perhaps. When the wind stirs us awake with each dawn.
    Before long, he knew, he would be cut down. Sometimes, after all, guilt must be excised with a knife. He would not resist. Of course, as the last surviving Senan staggered and fell, the final curse on their lips would be his name.
Strahl, who stole from us our glory.
Not much of a glory, to be sure. Maral Eb had been a fool and Strahl could shrug off most of the venom when it came to that fiasco.
Still, we could have died with weapons in our hands. That would have been something. Like spitting to clear the taste. Maybe the next watery mouthful of misery won’t be as bad. Like that. Just that one gesture.
    Eastward then. Each step slowing.
    Suicide was such an ugly word. But one could choose it for oneself. When it came to an entire people . . . well, that was different. Or was it?
I will lead us, until someone else does. I will ask for nothing. We march to our deaths. But then, it is all we ever do.
This last thought pleased him. In the ghoulish darkness, he smiled. Against futility, guilt did not stand a chance.
     
    Life is a desert, but, dear friends, between my legs you will find the sweetest oasis. Being dead, I can say this with not a hint of irony. If you were me, you’d understand.
    ‘You have a curious expression on that painted face, Captain. What are you thinking?’
    Shurq Elalle pulled her gaze from the desolate sweep of sullen grey waves and glanced over at Felash, fourteenth daughter of King Tarkulf and Queen Abrastal of Bolkando. ‘My First Mate was complaining, Princess, a short time ago.’
    ‘This has been a pleasant enough journey thus far, if somewhat tedious. What cause has he to complain?’
    ‘He is a noseless, one-eyed, one-handed, one-legged half-deaf man with terriblebreath, but I agree with you, Princess. No matter how bad things can appear to be, they can always get worse. Such is life.’
    ‘You speak with something like longing, Captain.’
    Shurq Elalle shrugged. ‘You may be young, but you are not easily deceived, Princess. I trust you comprehend my unique circumstances.’
    Felash pursed her plump lips, fluttering her fingers dismissively. ‘It took some time, to be honest. Indeed, it was my handmaiden who first broached the possibility. You do well in disguising your situation, Captain, a most admirable achievement.’
    ‘Thank you, Highness.’
    ‘Still, I wonder what so consumed your thoughts. Skorgen Kaban, I have learned, has no end of gripes, not least the plague of superstitions ever haunting him.’
    ‘He has not been at his best,’ Shurq admitted. ‘Ever since you purchased this extension, in fact. A thousand rumours have drifted from Kolanse, not one of them pleasing. The crew are miserable, and to the First Mate, that misery feeds his every fear.’
    ‘It is well understood, I trust,’ said Felash, ‘that most of the Perish fleet has preceded us. Have we seen any indication that disaster befell them?’
    ‘That depends,’ Shurq replied. ‘The absence of evidence of any sort is ominous enough, especially for sailors—’
    ‘Then they can never be satisfied, can they?’
    ‘Absolutely true, which is why I adore them so.’
    ‘Captain?’
    She smiled at the princess. ‘Neither can I. You wondered what I was thinking, and that is my answer.’
    ‘I see.’
    No, little girl, you do not. But never mind. Give it time.
    Felash continued: ‘How frustrated you must be!’
    ‘If it is frustration, it is a most delicious kind.’
    ‘I find you fascinating, Captain.’
    The plump princess was wearing a fur-lined cloak, the hood drawn up against the sharp offshore wind. Her round, heavily made-up face looked dusted and flawless. She clearly worked very hard at appearing older than she in truth was, but the effect reminded Shurq of those porcelain dolls the Shake used to find washed up on the beaches, the ones they traded away as if the things were cursed. Inhuman in perfection, but in truth hinting at deeper flaws. ‘And you in turn interest me, Highness. Is it the simple privilege of royalty that permits you to commandeer a foreign ship, captain and crew, and set out on a whim into the unknown?’
    ‘Privilege, Captain? Dear me, no. Burden, in fact. Knowledge is essential. The gathering of intelligence is what ensures the kingdom’s continued survival. We are not a great military power, such as the Letherii who can hold their insensitive bullying as if it was a virtue of forthright uncomplexity.