Easy

down and forced me. The few people I told about it—including my best friend—pointed out what would happen to him if I told. They stressed the fact that I hadn’t been a virgin, that we were dating, that we’d had sex before. So I kept quiet. I never even told my mother. That boy put bruises on my body. I was crying and begging him to stop and he didn’t. That’s called rape , ladies.”
    She drew herself up and crossed her arms over her chest. “So Buck can enjoy sitting in a cell contemplating how he blew up his life. That dickwad hurt two people sitting at this table . And you’re worried about who’ll look bad if they tell? Screw that. Dean and D.J. and Kennedy and every frat boy on this campus can all go fuck themselves. Are we sisters or not? ”

    ***
    Jacqueline,
    I’ve attached the review that I’ll hand out on Thursday. I guess it’s technically preferential for me to give it to you a couple of days early, but I did tell you that you were my favorite, after all.
    LM (aka Lucas, aka Landon, aka Mr. Maxfield)

    Mr. Landon Lucas Maxfield,
    It feels odd to get economics email from you. Like you aren’t really the same person. (I just remembered how I asked if you needed help in economics. I was all set to recommend you as a tutor to yourself . You must have thought I was so clueless.)
    Thank you for the review worksheet. I won’t even look at it until Thursday. That way you don’t need to feel guilty about giving it to me early.
    Mindi and I filed reports at the police station earlier. Erin drove us. It was the first time I actually gave anyone a detailed account of the whole thing. I was shaking and crying by the time I was done, and I felt weak and stupid all over again. Mindi was in even worse shape; the case worker said she may need to be treated for PTSD. She told us both to go to the school counseling office or a private therapist for treatment.
    Mindi called her parents on the way back to campus, and they’ll be on a flight here in the morning. It never even occurred to me to tell mine. I don’t think I could deal with another I-told-you-so speech from my mother. Not about this.
    I gave the detective your information, and she said they would call you when they want you to come in. I’m not sure what happens next.
    JW (aka Jacqueline, aka J, aka Ms. Wallace, aka Jackie - but will apply self-defense training as needed if called such)

    Ms. Jacqueline (not-Jackie) Wallace,
    I never for one moment thought you were clueless. I got caught up in my own deception, and I felt increasingly rotten about it. I’m glad you found out, and I’m sorry I didn’t tell you myself. If anyone was clueless, it was me.
    I feel like such a jackass for ever saying anything to make you think that any part of that night was your fault. I was so amped, and pissed—at him. If you hadn’t made that sound in the truck, I think I might have killed him.
    Did you both file a restraining order?
    Lucas

    Me: Can we switch to text?
    Lucas: Sure np
    Me: We got the paperwork to file a temporary RO tomorrow afternoon.
    Lucas: Good. If you feel threatened, I want you to call me. Ok?
    Me: Ok.
    Lucas: Tomorrow is my last class day in econ. Dr. H will be doing a review on Friday.
    Me: Obviously, you don’t need that. I thought you were a bad slacker student. Sitting on the back row, drawing, not paying any attention to the lecture.
    Lucas: I guess I did look that way. This is my third semester to tutor, and my fourth to sit through the class. I know the material pretty well.
    Me: So, after Wednesday, we don’t have class together? And after the final next Wednesday, then what?

    Several minutes passed, and I knew I’d asked a question he either didn’t know the answer to or didn’t want to answer.

    Lucas: Winter break. There are things you don’t know about me. I told myself I won’t lie to you again, but I’m not ready to put everything out there. I don’t know if I can. I’m sorry.

    Winter break began a week from Friday—the last day of fall finals. I was required to leave the dorm over break, and the spring semester wouldn’t begin for seven weeks. A lot could change in that space of time.
    I fell out of a tree in sixth grade and broke my arm. I couldn’t play my bass or braid my own hair for seven weeks. When I was fifteen, my best friend Dahlia went to summer camp for seven weeks. When she returned, she was best friends with Jillian. I remained friends with them both, but things were never the same