Faster We Burn

the shot glass up in the air and caught it. “Nothing, just hanging out at home. You want to come over?”
    “I’d love to. Be there in ten.”
    She hung up and I set my phone down, got a second shot glass from my cupboard and filled it up, pouring another one for myself. If I didn’t want to end up in the hospital, I was going to have to pace myself. Trish wasn’t here to save my sorry ass this time.
    I put the earring back in my pocket and waited.
    There was a knock at my door less than seven minutes later. I got up and answered it. She was dressed in a miniskirt with fishnets and a ripped tank top, as per usual.
    She put one hand up and leaned in the doorway seductively. Yep, I was drunk. “Hey, Stryk.”
    “Hey, Ric.”
    She gave me a kiss on the cheek that lingered. Her breath already smelled like alcohol, and I could tell she’d just put out a cigarette. God, I hadn’t smoked in a long time.
    “Ooohh, are we taking shots?” she said, seeing the drinks on the counter.
    “Yeah, I just need a smoke first. Come with me?”
    She smiled slow and stepped toward me, walking her fingers up and down my shirt.
    “Absolutely.”
    That was what Katie had said when I’d asked her if she wanted to fuck me the first time. The word hit me in the chest. I paused for a second, and Ric put her arm around me.
    “Something wrong, babe?”
    I looked down at her face, and picked it apart. Her eyes were too close together, her smile was too wide, her cheekbones too sharp. She was also too tall.
    She wasn’t Katie.
    I shut my eyes for a second and then opened them.
    “Nope.”
     
    Katie
     
    The ‘little chat’ with Mom turned into one of our yelling matches, as it always did. Kayla and Dad tried to stop it, but there was only so much they could do before we were both screaming at each other. Like a hurricane, they knew they just had to sit back, board up the doors and windows and wait for it to be over.
    “Say it, just come out and say it. You judged him the moment he walked in. You made up some image of what he would look like in your head and when he didn’t match that you freaked out, proving you are just as judgmental as I knew you were.”
    We were standing in the spotless kitchen now, having already taken the fight around the rest of the house. Dad and Kayla watched from the safety of the dining room table, ready to come in and referee if things got really bad.
    “That isn’t fair, Katie. You gave me no warning. What was I supposed to think?”
    I threw up my hands. “You weren’t supposed to think anything! You were supposed to wait and see what kind of guy he is.”
    She smashed her hands down on the counter with a slap. “How was I supposed to do that? You didn’t tell me anything about him.”
    “Would you have let him come if you knew?”
    She started to protest, but it was a second too late.
    “Yeah, that’s what I thought. God, Mom.” I stalked toward the living room. I couldn’t fight with her anymore. “Congratulations, you win. He’s gone and I’m going, too.” More often than not, our fights only ended when one of us stormed out.
    “Katiebug, don’t leave like this,” Dad said. “Don’t leave angry.”
    “I’m sorry I brought him here and ruined Thanksgiving. I’m sorry that I ruin everything. It seems to be my thing.” I ran to my room so I wouldn’t break down in front of them. I slipped on the photographs that were still all over the floor and landed hard on my side.
    “Shit!” I rolled over on my back, massaging my hip.
    “You’re being a brat, you know,” Kayla said, pushing my door open.
    “Yes, I am, but that’s what I do. I’m the screw-up little sister.” Kayla crouched down next to me where I still lay on the floor. I turned onto my back and glanced at her, wiping tears away.
    “That’s not true and you know it. Mom and Dad worship the ground you walk on. I used to hate you,” she said, lying on her back next to me.
    What in the what was she talking about? “Are you serious? You’re their golden child.”
    Kayla laughed as if that were genuinely funny.
    “It’s all about perspective.”
    “Whatever,” I said. She was nuts.
    Kayla picked up one of the pictures and it happened to be of Zack and me at a party. He had his arm around me, a bottle of beer just out of view. He was looking at the camera and I was looking at him.
    “I never understood what you saw in this douchebag.” She studied the picture for another moment, then ripped it in half.