Faster We Burn

salute. Trish waved goodbye as well, and then it was just Lottie and me.
    “Have you heard from Zack?” Lottie said as she cleared up the rest of the refuse from our little Katie pity party. I could tell she’d been waiting until we were alone.
    “Yeah, he’s left me a million messages. I’m just waiting for the “sorry I fucked up” gifts to start coming in.” I’d already put the necklace he’d given me from the last screw-up in my jewelry box.
    “Maybe you should change your cell number or something.”
    If only it were that easy. Something that simple wouldn’t stop Zack from finding another way to contact me. I’d take a million voicemails over him doing something really crazy, like showing up in one of my classes, or waiting at my car, or something else like that. Phone calls were harmless.
    I gave her a look.
    “Sorry. You probably don’t want to talk about him.”
    I stacked the pillows back on my bed for something to do. “Not really.”
    She handed me two more pillows. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked.”
    “It’s okay.” I should just record myself saying that and ‘I’m fine’ so I could play them back whenever I needed to.
    “You sure?” I grabbed the last pillow and placed it in the middle of the rest.
    “Yup.”
    She gave me another look and went to brush her teeth. I lay back on my bed and tried to forget that only a few hours ago, I’d been fucking Stryker in it. Tried, but did not succeed.
     
    Stryker
     
    “How is Lottie going to keep this a secret from Will? They have that creepy twin thing,” I said as I worked on replacing the clutch Zan had burned out while learning how to drive a standard on Will’s truck. The weather was getting colder and soon it would be nearly impossible to work outside without the potential risk of losing a few fingers or my nose to frostbite.
    “I don’t know, honestly. I’m shocked she’s managed to keep us a secret this long.”
    I wiped my hands on a rag and slid out from under the truck. Zan sat on a folding chair and worked on his banjo picking. The rest of the driveway was filled with some of my other car projects. It was a decent way to make a few bucks and my landlord didn’t seem to mind that I took up three times the spaces as long as I kept his car tuned up and running like a champ. I also bartended here and there when I got really strapped for cash, but I’d been doing better at saving money. Being dirt poor also meant you got great financial aid. I still had no clue what I’d do when I graduated, but I had plenty of options, thanks to being, what I told Zan, “a fucking genius”.
    “So you two are serious?” I said.
    He looked up from the banjo.
    “I love her. I thought I did before, but it was just an infatuation. This is different.”
    I leaned against the truck and shaded my eyes from the afternoon sun. “How?”
    “I used to think she was this perfect person. That everything she did was right. Now I know that she’s got flaws, but I love those flaws. She’s not perfect and I love her the way she is. She makes me want to be a better person, and she doesn’t care about everything in my past. How could I not fall for that?”
    Jesus, it was so simple for him.
    I’d never told a girl I loved her. Probably because I’d never loved one. At least not in the way Zan was talking. His past was dark, yes, but it was a temporary darkness. He hadn’t been born to it, hadn’t been raised in it. His parents were generally decent, and his brother, however fucked up he was, loved him too. He’d had money and second chances and people who’d pulled him through the dark.
    I shoved my past aside and went to help him with some of his fingering.
    Katie had been ignoring me and I’d been letting her, out of respect. She probably never wanted to see me again, and I was fine with that. Not that I wouldn’t have picked up the phone if she’d called me. I would have. The sex was great and I would be more than happy to let it happen again, if she wanted it to. I just wasn’t into forcing girls like some guys.
    I was about to answer Zan when my phone rang from my back pocket. I looked at the screen and it was an unknown number. It could have been someone calling my phone with a wrong number, but I didn’t think so.
    “Hello?” My greeting was met with silence and I was about to hang up when she spoke.
    “Hey,” Katie said after a long pause. “You said if I needed anything to call. I need a distraction. Of the