Fifty Shades Trilogy 01 - Fifty Shades of Grey

it’s true – I do trust him.
    “Well then,” he looks relieved. “The rest of this stuff is just details.”
    “Important details.”
    “Okay, let’s talk through those.”
    My head is swimming with all his words. I should have brought Kate’s mini-disc player so I can listen back to this. There is so much information, so much to process. The waiter re-emerges with our entrees: black cod, asparagus, and crushed potatoes with a hollandaise sauce. I have never felt less like food.
    “I hope you like fish,” Christian says mildly.
    I make a stab at my food and take a long drink of my sparkling water. I vehemently wish it was wine.
    “The rules. Let’s talk about them. The food is a deal breaker?”
    “Yes.”
    “Can I modify to say that you will eat at least three meals a day?”
    “No.” I am so not backing down on this. No one is going to dictate to me what I eat. How I fuck, yes, but eat… no, no way.
    He purses his lips.
    “I need to know that you’re not hungry.”
    I frown. Why?
    “You’ll have to trust me.”
    He gazes at me for a moment, and he relaxes.
    “Touché, Miss Steele,” he says quietly. “I concede the food and the sleep.”
    “Why can’t I look at you?”
    “That’s a Dom/sub thing. You’ll get used to it.”
    Will I?
    “Why can’t I touch you?”
    “Because you can’t.”
    His mouth sets in a mulish line.
    “Is it because of Mrs. Robinson?”
    He looks quizzically at me.
    “Why would you think that?” And immediately he understands. “You think she traumatized me?”
    I nod.
    “No, Anastasia. She’s not the reason. Besides, Mrs. Robinson wouldn’t take any of that shit from me.”
    Oh… but I have to. I pout.
    “So nothing to do with her.”
    “No. And I don’t want you touching yourself, either.”
    What? Ah yes, the no masturbation clause.
    “Out of curiosity… why?”
    “Because I want all your pleasure,” his voice is husky, but determined.
    Oh … I have no answer for that. On one level it’s up there with, ‘I want to bite that lip’; on another, it’s so selfish. I frown and take a bite of cod, trying to assess mentally what concessions I’ve gained. The food, the sleep, I can look him in the eye. He’s going to take it slow, and we haven’t discussed soft limits. But I’m not sure I can face that over food.
    “I’ve given you a great deal to think about, haven’t I?”
    “Yes.”
    “Do you want to go through the soft limits now, too?”
    “Not over dinner.”
    He smiles.
    “Squeamish?”
    “Something like that.”
    “You’ve not eaten very much.”
    “I’ve had enough.”
    “Three oysters, four bites of cod, and one asparagus stalk, no potatoes, no nuts, no olives, and you’ve not eaten all day. You said I could trust you.”
    Jeez. He’s kept an inventory.
    “Christian, please, it’s not every day I sit through conversations like this.”
    “I need you fit and healthy, Anastasia.”
    “I know.”
    “And right now, I want to peel you out of that dress.”
    I swallow. Peel me out of Kate’s dress. I feel the pull deep in my belly. Muscles that I’m now more acquainted with clench at his words. But I can’t have this. His most potent weapon, used against me again. He’s so good at sex – even I’ve figured this out.
    “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I murmur quietly. “We haven’t had dessert.”
    “You want dessert?” he snorts.
    “Yes.”
    “You could be dessert,” he murmurs suggestively.
    “I’m not sure I’m sweet enough.”
    “Anastasia, you’re deliciously sweet. I know.”
    “Christian. You use sex as a weapon. It really isn’t fair,” I whisper, staring down at my hands, and then looking directly at him. He raises his eyebrows, surprised, and I see he’s considering my words. He strokes his chin thoughtfully.
    “You’re right. I do. In life you use what you know, Anastasia. Doesn’t change how much I want you. Here. Now.”
    How can he seduce me solely with his voice? I’m panting already – my heated blood rushing through my veins, my nerves tingling.
    “I’d like to try something,” he breathes.
    I frown. He’s just given me a shit load of ideas to process and now this.
    “If you were my sub, you wouldn’t have to think about this. It would be easy.” His voice is soft, seductive. “All those decisions – all the wearying thought processes behind them. The – ‘is this the right thing to do? Should this happen here? Can it happen now?’ You wouldn’t have