Love is Always Write Anthology Volume 7

space and a free pillow.
    "Wanna talk about it?" he asked as Jimmy slid in behind him, taking up his usual position with his arms around Scott's waist.
    Sighing, pressing his face to the back of Scott's neck, "Not really." Jimmy murmured, holding him closer than usual.
    "Okay," Scott whispered into the dark, pulling the covers up higher and then resting his hand over Jimmy's, knowing the man would keep him up all night talking even if he said he didn't want to.
    After a long moment, Jimmy took in a deep breath, his words falling on the exhale, "It's a lot to think about."
    "Yeah."
    "I mean…a baby? Seriously? Who in their right mind looks at me and goes, ' that guy would make a great father .'?"
    "I think you'd make a great father." Scott told him honestly.
    "I still think with my dick."
    Laughing and lacing his fingers with Jimmy's, "I doubt that changes just because you're a dad. We all think with our dicks till they don't work anymore."
    "Yeah, but…"
    "Jimmy, it all boils down to whether or not you wanna be involved with putting another person on the planet. Tina said you could be anonymous as far as the kid goes."
    "Wouldn't feel right about that. I mean…it works for a lot of people and a lot of happy families are made because of guys that are fine with that and I think that's great, but…"
    "But it doesn't work for you. And that's okay."
    "Is it? I feel like a selfish shit telling them no. Like, just because I'm not ready to be a father I don't want them to be mothers or something."
    "You're not their only option, just their first choice. Kinda flattering, really."
    "Yeah, flattering." Jimmy said flatly, sighing again, "What would you do? If they'd asked you?"
    "Be grateful no one asked me to have sex with them to do it."
    Jimmy bit his ear lightly, "Seriously, jerkoff, would you do it?"
    "I jerkoff regularly."
    Laughing, Jimmy turned Scott onto his back and pinned him down, "You're such a douche." he told Scott, laughing, "First grownup conversation I try to have with you and you're making jokes."
    "And you're laughing for the first time in hours."
    Jimmy kissed him for that. Just a light press of his lips against Scott's cheek, a small breath and a smile. "Still wanna know your answer." he told Scott, settling back again and tugging Scott against him.
    "I don't know. Might be kinda cool. Like being an uncle with a little more…responsibility, I guess."
    "Mom and dad always wanted a house full." Jimmy whispered, sounding more serious again. "After Liam died, though…"
    Scott knew Jimmy had a younger brother that died in infancy, SIDS the first assumption, later finding out it was acid reflux and the baby stopped breathing in his sleep one night. "I'd probably feel the same way."
    "Me too. I mean…so much can go wrong ya know? A fall on the playground and they break their neck, or let the wrong person babysit just once . Or put him to bed and he never wakes up…"
    "Or he gets bumps and bruises and skinned knees and the flu like every other kid on the planet and then finds a cure for cancer…"
    "I'm not even into my residency." Letting out a heavy breath, Jimmy rested his chin on Scott's shoulder, their cheeks touching.
    "True. And it's not like this is your only shot at having kids. Or theirs."
    "So you think I shouldn't?"
    Laughing softly, still talking quietly, "I think you should do whatever you think is best for you right now. It's not like some old one night stand showed up and handed you a kid. This is a choice , not something that's happened to you."
    "What if I say no and they go with someone else and get an ugly baby?" Jimmy joked, Scott able to feel the man's smile against his cheek.
    "Tragic."
    "Maybe we should get a dog."
    "Instead of a kid?"
    "Or for the kid? I don't know, Christ."
    "I don't need a dog. I have you, remember?"
    Laughing for that, Jimmy growled and nipped at Scott's neck, "We're getting a dog."
    "Okay then."
    Scott smiled to himself, thinking how odd life was, the ups and downs and the in-betweens all seeming a little better with Jimmy to share them with.
    ****
    "You're stuck with me for life now, you know that, right?" Scott asked him.
    Three days after telling Carol and Stacy he'd need more time—possibly a lifetime—to think about their offer, Jimmy stood next to Scott in their living room, looking down at the two puppies playing at their feet. "Twelve to fifteen years, actually." Jimmy told him, Scott looking horrified.
    "Just long enough to really get attached?