Now or Never

around and smiled at her.
    He rubbed her thigh above the covers. “Hey. Fix me dinner, Ok?”
    She nodded and tossed off the blankets.
    As the bathroom door shut behind him, and the shower turned on, Grayson breathed a sigh of relief. He worked the night shift, so he wouldn’t be back until three in the morning. That left plenty of time for her to make a break for it.
    The kitchen filled with the strong scent of coffee brewing. She listened to him as he got ready; always thumping loudly around the bedroom. She put together a ham and cheese sandwich for him, making sure to use enough mayo, so he wouldn’t get pissed. A Ziploc baggie full of potato chips and an apple went into his lunch bag, and she filled his thirty-two-ounce canister with coffee and sugar.
    “That’s my girl.” She hadn’t even heard him enter the kitchen. Josh kissed her on the cheek as he swiped the lunch bag and coffee. He twisted the cap and took a chug, then made a face. “Not enough sugar.”
    Grayson froze, adrenaline pumping. She’d already survived one outburst today; she really didn’t want or need another.
    He shrugged. “No big deal. I don’t need a sugar crash anyway. See you when I get home. Keep the bed warm for me.”
    “Of course,” Grayson said, working overtime to keep her voice steady as she walked him to the door.
    They kissed good-bye — for the last time, Grayson promised herself. The door slammed shut behind him. Good riddance.
    Excitement and fear bubbled up in her chest as she turned around for one last look. This place, with its stark white walls and black furniture, had never felt like home. Even though they’d shared it for the last two years, it was always Josh’s place. Grayson might as well have been a decoration set off to the side.
    Or a welcome mat, she thought bitterly. She hated it and would gladly leave it behind.
    Grayson jumped into motion.
    She pulled her suitcase from the front closet where it was wedged beneath two years’ worth of accumulated belongings. In the bedroom, she grabbed clothes at random: jeans, sweaters, T-shirts, and undergarments, shoving them all inside. Her entire wardrobe wouldn’t fit in her suitcase, but she didn’t care.
    Taking her jewelry box off the dresser, she dumped the contents on top of her clothes, pausing as her rocks clunked into place. Pushing her bras and underwear to the side, Grayson pulled out a translucent amethyst the size of her fist and held it tightly to her chest. She had collected stones since she was a child. Josh thought it was a stupid hobby, so she hid them away. He thought pretty much everything she liked or did was a waste of time.
    My new place will be filled with crystals , she thought with a smile, a new beginning.
    Tossing the amethyst back in the bag, she thought, what else am I missing? She hated to leave her books, but they were replaceable. Everything was replaceable, except for her life. And she knew if she didn’t leave now, she just might lose that, too.
    Now or never, she thought.
    Grayson decided to go with ‘now’; life was too short to be this miserable.
    She pushed down on the suitcase and zipped it closed. With a thud, she dropped it to the floor and pulled out the handle, dragging it behind her.
    Standing in the doorway to the dim bedroom, she looked one last time at the plaid maroon and green bedspread on the king-sized bed and the ugly carpet. Josh didn’t want anything ‘girly’ in his place. It looked like a bachelor pad. The only things that showed Grayson’s personality had been hidden away in her dresser for two long years.
    She longed for her old bedroom where her mother had let her paint the walls and ceiling a burnt orange. She thought it looked like the Grand Canyon; her own little cave. All the furniture had been dark wood, and her crystals had been on prominent display.
    Her new place would look like that.
    In the living room, she grabbed her photo albums from the bookshelf and threw them in the backpack that held her laptop. She couldn’t leave them behind when they held so many childhood memories.
    From the TV stand, she grabbed two small picture frames—one of her with her twin sister, and the second of a couple of friends from school. By the light of the television, Grayson stared down at the picture of her friends. She used to be so close to her group of girlfriends, but Josh got jealous if she spent time with anyone else, so she pulled away from the friends that she once treasured more than