Override (Glitch)

in.
    I am that, I repeated desperately to myself, trying to find my center. I am that. But they were just words without meaning.
    Then Max’s face popped into my head, and with it a swelling tide of rage. I am that . I visualized the billowing red rage and clung to it. Fear had no place here. The buzzing rose to a squealing pitch in my ears. I opened my eyes, awash with the power humming underneath my skin.
    I pulled the helmet and face mask over my head, fastened everything in place, and headed toward the transport bay. It was time.
    *   *   *
    There was no moon, only the soft sifting of stars as we flew through the night sky. I looked up at Taylor’s face in the rearview mirror. “I understand why it couldn’t be Adrien’s mom, but why not let someone else take me?”
    “It had to be me.”
    I paused a moment. “Adrien told you. He had a vision about this.” It wasn’t a question. Another thought struck. “Did he know he was going to get captured?”
    Taylor was silent a moment before answering. “Yes, he knew he would be captured, but he didn’t know when.”
    I almost jumped out of my seat. “Then how could you have let him go on the raid?”
    “He didn’t tell me.” Her voice was calm and even. “He’d been keeping a vision journal full of everything he saw and his theories about how things might connect. It was an elaborate, spiderwebbed map. I found it when we returned from the raid. I forbade him from leaving the Foundation after that.” In the mirror, I saw her frown. “Of course, it was already too late by then. I was talking to Maximin without knowing it.”
    I sat back, feeling baffled and angry at Adrien. I thought about when he’d taken me to watch the sunset before the raid. He’d talked about how precious time was, but I hadn’t realized it was because he knew his was running out. “Why did he go? Why would he do that if he knew he’d be captured?”
    She pursed her lips. “He didn’t know when it would happen, and he insisted on going on the raid. He said it had to do with protecting the causality chain. Along with the vision journal, he had endless scribbled notes about research into temporal paradoxes and causality links.”
    “Causality? What does that even mean?”
    She looked away. “He said he needed to make sure certain visions were fulfilled in order for others to come true.”
    I sat back in my seat. “If he needed to protect a vision and make it come true, it meant he believed they could still be altered,” I said, stunned. After all Adrien’s concern and doubt and despair about his visions, he’d still held on to hope. He’d still believed he could make a difference.
    “Do you think they can be changed?” I asked.
    “I sure as hell want to.” Her grip on the control stick tightened. “But still, here I am, driving straight toward my fate anyway.”
    I let out a small gasp as another realization smacked me like a club to the face. All this time, I’d thought the vision Adrien had told the General—the one that had made her desperate—was about some mission or the future of the Rez. But it was suddenly clear that it was much more personal than that.
    “Did he tell you—” I stopped, clutching the seat rest and bracing myself for the question I had to ask. “Does something happen to you on this mission?”
    Her silence was answer enough.
    “We have to go back. Find another way.” My words tumbled over one another. “We can stop his vision from coming true. Maybe if someone else takes me it won’t turn out the same—”
    “I’m no coward,” Taylor cut me off sharply. “Besides, I might not know how the causality chain works, but it’s clear it’s too important to disrupt.” Her tone shifted, urgent. “I need you to do something for me. Should we fail to take down the Chancellor, there is an operation in motion that must continue. It’s called Operation Kill Switch, and—”
    “You mean the nuclear bomb you were going to use to create an EMP.”
    “You’ve seen the plans, then.” She nodded, her voice only carrying a small note of surprise. “Good. That makes this simpler.”
    “But I’m not going to help you.”
    She let out a quick angry breath. “We have the means of ending this war forever, and you’re saying no? Millions of lives could be saved. Civilization could be restored. This is the difference I am meant to make with my life.
    “You’re young. You still believe that if you just try hard enough, you can do