Page from a Tennessee Journal (AmazonEncore Edition)

the pillow, her hands limp in the muddled bed-coverings.
    “Um.” The broken bits of timber eased out, and air oozed back into her chest.
    “I’ve got it,” Alex shouted.
    Annalaura lolled her head to the side in time to see a little smile cross Alex’s lips.
    “I’ve got…Laurie, I think it’s a girl.” He lifted his surprised eyes to her face.
    She felt the muscles in her cheeks work themselves into a weak half smile. Alex’s eyes flitted from her back to the baby. She saw the light in them move from bright surprise to fear. He moved a bloody bundle into Annalaura’s line of sight. She turned away.
    “Ain’t she supposed to cry?” He whispered the question like he knew he was sitting in a death room.
    “Hold her up by the feet. Smack her bottom.” Annalaura’s eyes closed when she heard the light tap on the baby’s backside. Sensible thoughts started to make their way back into her head. Maybe the Lord wasn’t going to take her tonight after all.
    “Harder.” She felt her voice growing stronger.
    As she let her chest take in more welcome air, she smiled at Alex. Even if he didn’t know how to do this part, she wished she had the strength to tell him her thank-yous for all the rest. The second, louder slap brought a familiar wail that filled the cabin.
    “She’s just fine,” Annalaura announced. She hadn’t wanted this baby. She knew that nothing but a lifetime of trouble awaited them both. Still, she needed to know if the child had all her fingers and toes. Annalaura would do what she had to soon enough. But for now, it was best if she didn’t set eyes on Alex’s baby.
    Alex stared at the infant as though he’d never seen a newborn human before. Then Annalaura remembered. Hadn’t his own firstborn come out dead? If Tennessee allowed, she would take Alex in her arms. Another gulp of air, and Annalaura pushed that thought away faster than any of the others about the man who had just saved her life.
    “Let her down and clean her up.” Those were the only safe words to say to him.
    Alex’s face showed confusion as he looked for a place to lay the baby. He reached toward her stomach.
    “No. Lay it on the bed. I don’t need to see it.” The words came out too late. As he wiped a damp rag over the baby’s chest, Annalaura caught a glimpse. A new fright washed over her.
    “Alex, what do she look like?” Please, Lord, let the herbs have done their job.
    “She’s good. She’s better’n good. She’s perfect.” The sound of wonder seeped into Alex’s voice.
    “But what do she look like?” Annalaura pressed.
    Alex lifted the baby toward her, and she wrenched her head toward the far cabin wall. She knew she had to care for this child, but if she could put off looking at it just a bit longer…
    “No. I don’t need to see it. Just tell me.” She caught his confusion in that little shrug of his shoulders.
    “I reckon all her parts are here, but is she supposed to be this little?” That edge of fright hadn’t left his voice.
    “What color?” Annalaura knew what Alex didn’t.
    Colored babies oft en came out with pale, alabaster-looking skin, only to darken nicely in the first few months. But that first quick glance she’d had of Alexander’s child told her that this baby’s color was all wrong. The infant’s skin showed a creamy pink, not a golden, fried-potato brown. Maybe there was still hope. Aunt Becky told her that a colored child’s true color stayed hidden behind the ear. Many a light-skinned newborn child was lucky enough to turn a beautiful chocolate brown within three months. And, if Aunt Becky was right, the truth lay there all the time, just behind the ear.
    “They’re blue.” Alex shouted the word in the room.
    “Blue?”
    “Yeah, her eyes are blue…like…like mine.” His voice dripped pride.
    He cradled the baby in his arms, stroking a finger over the child’s foot. He caught Annalaura’s eyes staring at him and returned a funny little half smile like he couldn’t quite trust the good fortune his own eyes were telling him.
    Her heart spiraled down into her chest. Only fair-skinned colored children started out with blue eyes. The darkest they ever showed was a greenish-brown.
    “Behind her ear. Look behind her ear.” Annalaura tried to keep the fright out of her voice, but the worry crept in.
    She held her breath while Alex shot a puzzled look at her.
    “What’s behind her ear?” She shielded her eyes as he turned the baby, but not in time