Point of Retreat

kiss them. I lay my head back down on her pillow and brush her hair behind her ear with my fingers.
     
    This entire past week has been hell. Mentally and physically. But especially mentally. I came so close to losing her. So close. Sometimes when it’s quiet, my mind wanders to the possibility of having lost her, and what I would have done. I have to keep reeling myself back in. I keep having to remind myself that she’s okay. That everyone’s okay.
     
    I didn’t think it was possible, but everything Lake and I have been through this entire past month has somehow made me love her even more. I can’t even begin to imagine my life without her in it. I think back to the video Sherry showed me, and to what Jim said to her.
     
    “ It’s like you came along and woke up my soul.”
     
    That’s exactly what Lake did to me. She woke up my soul.
     
    I lean in and kiss her again; longer this time. But not too long, I just feel like she’s so fragile.
     
    “This sucks,” she says. “Do you realize how hard it’ll be sleeping in the same bed with you? Are you sure he specified an entire month? We have to retreat for a whole month?”
     
    “Well, technically he said four weeks,” I say, stroking her arm with my hand. “I guess we could stick to four weeks since it’s a few days shy of a whole month.”
     
    “See? You should have taken me up on the offer when you had the chance. Now we have to wait four more weeks!" she says. "How many weeks is that total?”
     
    “It’ll be sixty-five,” I quickly respond. “Not that I’m counting. And four weeks from today is February 28. Not that I’m counting that, either.”
     
    She laughs. “February 28? But that’ll be a Tuesday. Who wants to lose their virginity on a Tuesday? Let’s make it the Friday before. February 24th. We’ll get Kel and Caulder to stay with your grandparent’s again.”
     
    “Nope. Four weeks. Doctors’ orders,” I say. “We’ll make a deal. I’ll get my grandparent’s to watch the boys again if we can make it to March 2nd. The Friday after it’s been four weeks.”
     
    “March 2nd is a Thursday.”
     
    “It’s a leap year.”
     
    “Ugh! Fine. March 2nd,” she says. “But I want a suite this time. A big one.”
     
    “You got it.”
     
    “With chocolates. And flowers.”
     
    “You got it,” I say. I lift my head off of her pillow and kiss her, then roll over.
     
    "And a fruit tray. With strawberries."
     
    "You got it," I say again. I yawn and pull the covers up over my head.
     
    "And I want one of those fluffy hotel robes. Both of us. That way we can wear them all weekend."
     
    "Whatever you want, Lake. Now go to sleep. You need to rest."
     
    She's done nothing but sleep for five days, so I’m not surprised she's wide awake. I, on the other hand, have had close to zero sleep for five days. I could barely keep my eyes open today. It feels so good to be back home, back in my bed. It especially feels good that Lake's right next to me.
     
    “Will?” she whispers.
     
    “Yeah?”
     
    “I have to pee.”
     
     
     
     
     
    ***
     
     
     
     
     
    “Are you sure you’ll be okay?” I ask her for the tenth time this morning.
     
    “I’ll be fine,” she says. She holds the phone up to show me she has it close by.
     
    “Okay. Sherry’s at home if you need her. I’ll be back in an hour, the luncheon shouldn’t last that long.”
     
    “Babe, I’m fine. Promise.”
     
    I kiss her on the forehead. “I know.”
     
    And I do know she’s fine. She’s more than fine. She’s been so focused and determined to get better that she’s doing way too much on her own now. Even things she shouldn’t be doing on her own, which is why I worry. Her indomitable will that I fell in love with sometimes irritates the hell out of me, too.
     
    ***
     
    When I walk into the gymnasium, I scan the area looking for the boys. Caulder is waving when I see him, so I walk to his table.
     
    “Where’s Kel and Kiersten?” I say as I take my seat.
     
    “Mrs. Brill wouldn’t let them come,” he says.
     
    “Why?” I jerk my head around looking for Mrs. Brill.
     
    “She said they were just using this lunch as an excuse to get out of study hall. She made them go to regular lunch at 10:45. Kel told her you’d be mad.”
     
    “Well, Kel’s right,” I say. “I’ll be right back.”
     
    I walk out of the gymnasium and turn left to head to the cafeteria. When I walk inside, the noise penetrates my