Princess: A True Story of Life Behind the Veil in Saudi Arabia

he was sure to be furious with
Mother for defending her daughter. In Saudi Arabia, the elderly are
truly revered. No matter what they do or say, or how they behave,
no one dares confront someone of age. When she faced the old woman,
my mother had been a tigress, protecting her young. My heart felt
as though it would burst from pride at her courage.
    After three days, without calling once,
Sara’s husband came to the clinic to claim his property. By the
time he arrived, Mother had discovered the source of Sara’s agony.
She confronted her son-in-law with contempt. Sara’s new husband was
sadistic. He had subjected my sister to sickening sexual brutality
until she felt her only escape was death. But after Father traveled
to Jeddah, even he was repelled when he heard of his daughter’s
sufferings. But Father agreed with his son-in-law that a wife
belonged with her husband. Sara’s husband promised Father that his
relations with her would conform to a life of normalcy.
    Mother’s hand trembled and her mouth
stretched in a howl when Father told her of his decision. Sara
began to weep and tried to leave the bed, saying she did not wish
to live. She threatened to slit her wrists if forced to return to
her husband. Mother stood over her daughter like a mountain and,
for the first time in her life, defied her husband. She told him
that Sara would never return to the house of a monster, and that
she, Mother, would go to the king and the Council of Religious Men
with the story, and neither would allow such a matter to continue.
Father threatened Mother with divorce. She stood fast and told him
to do whatever he had to do, but her daughter would not return to
swim in such evil.
    Father stood, unblinking. He probably
realized that in all likelihood, Sara would be forced by the men of
religion to return to her husband. If the past were any precedent,
they would advise the husband to deal with his wife in the manner
spelled out by the Koran, and then they would turn their backs to
such a disagreeable situation. Father stood, staring, analyzing
Mother’s resolve. Askance at her apparent resoluteness, and wanting
to avoid public interference in a family matter, for once in their
married life, he gave in. Since we were of the Royal Family and he
did not wish to sever his ties with my father, the husband
reluctantly agreed to divorce Sara.
    Islam gives the right of divorce to men,
without any question of motive. Yet it is very difficult for a
woman to divorce her husband. Had Sara been forced to file for the
separation, many difficulties would have arisen, for the religious
authorities might have ruled, “You might dislike a thing for which
Allah has meant for your own good”, and forced Sara to remain with
her husband. But Sara’s husband relented and uttered the words “I
divorce you” three times in the presence of two male witnesses. The
divorce was final in a matter of moments.
    Sara was free! She returned to our home.
Every upheaval is a transition. My young world was transformed by
Sara’s wedding, attempted suicide, and divorce. Fresh thoughts and
ideas began to grow in my mind; I was never to think as a child
again.
    For hours I pondered the primitive traditions
surrounding marriage in my land. Numerous factors determine the
marriageability of a girl in Saudi Arabia: her family name, her
family fortune, her lack of deformities, and her beauty. Social
dating is taboo, so a man must depend on his eagle-eyed mother and
sisters to constantly seek out proper matches for him. Even after
the promise to marry is made and the date is set, rarely does a
girl meet her future husband prior to the wedding, though there are
times when individual families allow the exchange of pictures.
    If a girl is of a good family and without
deformity, she will enjoy a number of marriage proposals. If she is
a beauty, many men will send their mothers or fathers to beg for
marriage, for beauty is a great commodity for women in Saudi
Arabia. Of course, no scandal can mar the reputation of the beauty,
or her desirability will fade; such a girl will find herself
married as the third or fourth wife to an old man in a faraway
village.
    Many Saudi men leave the final decision of
the marriage of their daughters to their wives, knowing they will
make the best match possible for the family. Still, often the
mother too will insist upon an unwanted marriage, even as her
daughter protests. After all, she herself had married a man she
feared, and her life