Private Scandals

were interested at all. You like being able to plug into any story that comes along. Toss your garment bag over your shoulder, pick up your laptop and go.”
    “The paladin of newscasters.” He toyed with her earring. “I’d still do that, to an extent. When something breaks, I’d go, but I’d be covering it for the show. We’d do remotes whenever they were called for, but we’d base here in Chicago.” That had been a sticking point, since Barlow had wanted him in New York. “I’d be able to take a story and explore all the angles instead of fitting it into a three-minute piece on the news. And I’d spend more time here. With you.”
    “I don’t want you to do this for me.” She got to her feet quickly. “I won’t deny that it’s hard for me to say goodbye so often, but—”
    “You’ve never said so.”
    “It wouldn’t have been fair. God, Finn.” She dragged both hands through her hair. “What could I have said? Don’t go. I know there are world-altering events taking place, but I’d rather you stay home with me?”
    He rose as well, brushed a knuckle down her cheek. “It wouldn’t have hurt my ego to hear it.”
    His quiet words shivered through her. “It wouldn’t have been fair to either of us. And you changing the thrust of your career because of me won’t be fair either.”
    “I’m not just doing this for you. I’m doing it for myself, too.”
    “You said you didn’t want to put down roots.” She was distressed, because she realized she was near tears. She wouldn’t have been able to explain them to him, or to herself. “I remember that. Finn, we’re professionals, and we both understand the demands of the career. I don’t want to make you feel pressured.”
    “You don’t get it, do you?” His impatience was back. “There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you, Deanna. Things have changed for me in this past year. It’s not as easy for me to pick up and go. It’s not a snap for me to fall asleep in some hotel halfway around the world. I miss you.”
    “I miss you too,” she said. “Does that make you happy?”
    “Damn straight it does.” He eased her forward, kissed her softly, gently, until her mouth grew greedy and hot under his. “I want you to miss me. I want it to kill you every time I goaway. And I want you to feel as baffled and uncomfortable and as frustrated as I am with this whole mess we’ve gotten ourselves into.”
    “Well, I do, so that’s just fine for both of us.”
    “Fine and dandy.” He released her. If she wanted to fight with reason, he’d give her plenty of it. Objective words were, after all, his stock-in-trade. “I’ll still have to go. I’ll have more control over where and when, but I’ll have to go. And I want you to suffer whenever I do.”
    “You,” she said precisely, “can go to hell.”
    “Not without you.” He caught her face in his hand, holding tight when she would have jerked away. “Goddamn it, Deanna. I love you.”
    When his hand went limp, she stepped back on shaky legs. Her eyes were huge and fixed on his face. It took her a moment before she could breathe again. Another moment before she could form coherent words. “You’ve never said that before.”
    Her reaction wasn’t precisely what he’d hoped for. Then again, he had to admit that his declaration hadn’t been exactly polished. “I’m saying it now. You have a problem with it?”
    “Do you?”
    “I asked you first.”
    She only shook her head. “I don’t suppose I do. It makes it kind of handy, because I love you too.” She let out a quick, catchy sigh. “I didn’t realize how much I needed the words.”
    “You’re not the only one who has to take things in stages.” He reached out, touched her cheek. “Pretty scary, huh?”
    “Yeah.” She took his wrist, held tight while the first flood of pleasure poured through her. “I don’t mind being scared. In fact, I like it, so if you’d like to tell me again, it’s okay.”
    “I love you.” He scooped her up, making her laugh as they tumbled onto the couch. “You’d better hold on to me,” he warned her, and tugged her sweater over her head. “I’m about to scare you to death.”

Chapter Eighteen
    I n Depth with Finn Riley premiered in January, a mid-season replacement for a disastrous hospital drama. The network had high hopes that a weekly news magazine featuring a recognizable face could drag the time slot out of the ratings basement. Finn had experience and credibility,