Redshirts

“The last ship I was stationed on.”

CHAPTER ELEVEN
    “Trust me, Andy,” Finn said, walking with Dahl toward Duvall’s barracks. “She doesn’t want to talk to you.”
    “You don’t know that,” Dahl said.
    “I do know that,” Finn said.
    “Yeah?” Dahl asked. “How?”
    “When I saw her just after she came out of her briefing, she said to me, ‘If I see Andy, I swear to God I’m going to break his nose,’” Finn said. Dahl smiled.
    The two of them reached Duvall’s barracks and entered the room, which was empty except for Duvall, sitting on her bunk.
    “Maia,” Dahl began.
    “Andy,” Duvall said, stood, and punched Dahl in the face. Dahl collapsed to the deck, holding his nose.
    “I told you,” Finn said to Dahl, on the deck. He looked over to Duvall. “I did tell him.”
    “I thought you were kidding!” Dahl said from the deck.
    “Surprise,” Finn said.
    Dahl pulled his hand back from his face to see if there was any blood on it; there wasn’t. “What was that for?” he asked Duvall.
    “It’s for your conspiracy theories,” Duvall said.
    “They’re not my theories,” Dahl said. “They’re Jenkins’ theories.”
    “For Christ’s sake, it doesn’t matter who thought up the fucking things!” Duvall snapped. “I’m in that goddamned meeting today, telling them what I know about the Nantes, and all the time I’m doing that I’m thinking, ‘This is it, this is the episode where I die.’ And then I look over at Kerensky, and he’s making cow eyes at me, like we’re married instead of just screwing. And then I know I’m doomed, because if that son of a bitch has a crush on me, it makes it perfect if I get killed off. Because then he can be sad at the end of the episode.”
    “It doesn’t have to work that way, Maia,” Dahl said, and started to get up. She pushed him back down.
    “Shut up, Andy,” she said. “Just shut up. You’re not getting it. It doesn’t matter if it’s going to work that way. What matters is now I’m buying into your paranoia. Now some part of my brain is thinking about buying it on an away mission. It’s thinking about it all the time. It’s like waiting for the other shoe to drop. And you fucking did it to me. Thank you so very much.” Duvall sat down on her bunk, pissed.
    “I’m sorry,” Dahl said, after a minute.
    “Sorry,” Duvall said, and laughed a small laugh. “Jesus, Andy.”
    “What went on in the officer briefing?” Finn asked.
    “I briefed them about the Nantes and its crew,” Duvall said. “The Calendrian rebels have a spy or turncoat in the crew, someone who could hack into the weapons systems and fire on the pontifex’s ship, and then shut down communications. We’ve heard nothing from the Nantes since the attack.”
    “Why would they put a spy on the Nantes ?” Finn asked. “It was the Intrepid that was supposed to escort the pontifex’s ship.”
    “They must have known the Nantes was the backup ship for this mission,” Duvall said. “And it’s easier to sneak a spy on the Nantes than on the flagship of the Universal Union. So they send a ship to attack us, knock us out of the mission, and then the Nantes is in a perfect position to take a shot at the pontifex’s ship. And that’s the other thing—” Duvall pointed at Dahl. “Because when we’re being told this in the briefing, I’m thinking ‘How far ahead would you have to plant a spy? How could they have known the Nantes would be the backup ship for a mission that was just assigned a couple of days ago? How likely is that?’ And then I think ‘This episode needs to be better edited.’” She looked down at Dahl. “And that’s when I decided I was going to punch you in the head the next time I saw you.”
    “Jenkins did say he didn’t think the show was very good,” Dahl said.
    Duvall cocked back her arm. “Don’t make me do it again, Andy,” she said.
    “Is there an away team?” Finn asked.
    “Yes,” Duvall said. “And I’m on it. The Nantes is silent and it isn’t moving, so the Intrepid has been ordered to investigate the situation on the Nantes and to defend the pontifex’s ship from any further attack. I was stationed on the Nantes and I was a ground trooper, so that makes me the guide for the away team. And I’m likely to get everyone on the team killed now, since thanks to Andy I’m convinced this is when it makes dramatic sense for me to get shot between the eyes.”
    “When do we arrive?” Finn