Rough Trade

around the massive table. They were dressed in suits and ties—unusual for a Saturday—and no doubt meant to signal the serious nature of these proceedings. Skip Tillman sat at the head of the table, and you could tell that even after all these years it still gave him a secret thrill.
    It didn’t help that I felt like roadkill. Muscles in my neck and back that I’d never even given a thought to now screamed out for my attention. The bruise on my shoulder where the Jester caught me with the pipe now extended halfway to my waist and was complemented by a perfectly round imprint, in deep purple, of the circumference of my defunct Volvo’s steering wheel that now graced the center of my chest.
    Overnight, I found that I’d developed a newfound appreciation for the work of personal injury attorneys. If Callahan Ross gave me the boot, maybe I would be able to find gainful employment in that field. Too bad there was nobody to sue in my accident. In my life the worst damage has always had a way of turning out to be self-inflicted.
    My discomfort was not entirely physical. I’d been up half the night contemplating my life and wondering what had ever possessed me to say what I had to Stephen. I’d spent the other half of the night wondering why he hadn’t said a single thing to try to get me to change my mind.
    Aching and unable to sleep, I’d finally gotten out of bed, wrapped myself in an old flannel bathrobe that had once belonged to my husband, and sat on the glassed-in porch of the apartment that I shared with Claudia. From there I was able to watch Hyde Park street life as it played itself out on the busy corner outside my window. If I’d been hoping for an epiphany, I was disappointed. I saw dope deals, arguments, tired people coming home from work on the bus, but no answers.
    And yet what I saw beyond my window made me realize something important. In the years since Russell died, I’d spent my waking hours in the five city blocks that surround my office, blocks crammed with granite, avarice, and old men. I’d let my world grow much too small. If I was willing to allow the phlegmy old men of Callahan Ross, who now sat frowning above the wattles of their chins at me, to be my judges and declare my worth, then I’d allowed my soul to be narrowed hopelessly, as well.
    All this went through my mind as I stood and faced them. As painful as it was to find myself taken to the woodshed by such an experienced and vindictive bunch, I told myself there wasn’t much they could do to me without my consent. Partners are not subject to summary dismissal, and right now the most they could do was try to shame me into quitting.
    Not that they couldn’t make life difficult for me. No one wants to belong to a club where the other members were determined to make life as unpleasant for you as possible. Now that my secretary had been demoted to the word processing pool, I fully expected to come in on Monday and find that I’d been reassigned to an office in the supply closet and my name deliberately misspelled on the firm’s letterhead.
    Skip Tillman cleared his throat. “We’ve called you here this morning to give you an opportunity to give your own account of events leading up to this firm’s being dismissed as counsel from Avco Enterprises.”
    From his tone of voice it was clear that I was being called on the carpet. The words might express the intention to be fair, but everything else about the exchange indicated that the outcome was a foregone conclusion.
    “No,” I said.
    “Pardon me?”
    “No. I do not wish to explain. Everyone in this room knows what happened yesterday. I see no reason to go into it.”
    “Kate,” said Tillman sadly, “I don’t think you fully understand the gravity of the situation.”
    Rumor had it that all of his political brownnosing had finally landed him on the short list for appointments to the federal bench. It sounded to me like he’d already started practicing his delivery.
    “Skip, if you don’t think I’m smart enough to understand what’s going on, then you should never have made me a partner in the first place. As you know, I have been retained to represent the Milwaukee Monarchs football team, which is in desperate need of our services. I was in Milwaukee on that matter yesterday when I was regrettably detained.” I was not about to regale them with tales of the break-in at Chrissy’s house. Not only did it sound too much like the dog-ate-my-homework excuse, but also