Santa Clawed

tinkling when they touched one another.
    Harry got up and reached into the tree to steady it by grasping the trunk. Her reward was to be pricked by the sharp needles.
    The cats hollered,
“We’re the tops, we’re the cat’s pajamas.”
    It was just as well that Cole Porter had gone to his reward and that Harry had no idea what those two were shouting about.

Ho Ho Ho

    Isn’t Christmas the best? A trimmed tree to climb, presents to shred, food that falls under the table or is helpfully pushed off. Christmas is a cat’s favorite holiday.
    There is one little quibble I have with how humans view Christmas. Who do you think kept mice away from Baby Jesus? Who curled up in His cradle to keep Him warm? The swaddling clothes weren’t worth squat. A cat. Oh sure, there was a donkey there and a cow and chickens, but it was a cat that did the work. A few humans remember because a tiger cat with an M on its forehead is a descendant of Mary’s cat.
    Even if you don’t have a Mary’s cat, do shower your puss with tuna, chicken, beef, ham, capons, goose, catnip, and warm fuzzies to sleep on. It’s the Christian thing to do.

    Sneaky Pie

Dear Reader,

    For once I’ve read Sneaky’s missive to you all and I agree one hundred percent. Let me add one thing: give to your local humane shelter. Give as generously as you can. Some of the cats and dogs are there because their owner has passed away or is ill and can no longer attend to them. Most are there because of crass human irresponsibility. Personally, I’d like to bring back the stocks and put these sorry so-and-so’s in them for all to see. It’s humans who maim and abandon pets, not the reverse. So do remember Mary’s cat and all the others who are temporarily dependent on you. As Blanche DuBois said, “I have always depended on the kindness of strangers.”
    Merry Christmas.
Happy New Year.

About the Authors
    RITA MAE BROWN is the bestselling author of several books. An Emmy-nominated screenwriter and poet, she lives in Afton, Virginia. Her website is www.ritamaebrown.com . She does not own a computer. God willing, she never will. Sometimes the website manager sends your queries. The safest way to reach her is in care of Bantam Books.
             
    SNEAKY PIE BROWN , a tiger cat born somewhere in Albemarle County, Virginia, was discovered by Rita Mae Brown at her local SPCA. They have collaborated on seventeen Mrs. Murphy mysteries:
Wish You Were Here; Rest in Pieces; Murder at Monticello; Pay Dirt; Murder, She Meowed; Murder on the Prowl; Cat on the Scent; Pawing Through the Past; Claws and Effect; Catch as Cat Can; The Tail of the Tip-Off; Whisker of Evil; Cat’s Eyewitness; Sour Puss; Puss ’n Cahoots; The Purrfect Murder;
and
Santa Clawed,
in addition to
Sneaky Pie’s Cookbook for Mystery Lovers.

Books by Rita Mae Brown & Sneaky Pie Brown
    WISH YOU WERE HERE
    REST IN PIECES
    MURDER AT MONTICELLO
    PAY DIRT
    MURDER, SHE MEOWED
    MURDER ON THE PROWL
    CAT ON THE SCENT
    SNEAKY PIE’S COOKBOOK FOR MYSTERY LOVERS
    PAWING THROUGH THE PAST
    CLAWS AND EFFECT
    CATCH AS CAT CAN
    THE TAIL OF THE TIP-OFF
    WHISKER OF EVIL
    CAT’S EYEWITNESS
    SOUR PUSS
    PUSS ’N CAHOOTS
    THE PURRFECT MURDER
    SANTA CLAWED

    Books by Rita Mae Brown

    THE HAND THAT CRADLES THE ROCK
    SONGS TO A HANDSOME WOMAN
    THE PLAIN BROWN RAPPER
    RUBYFRUIT JUNGLE
    IN HER DAY
    SIX OF ONE
    SOUTHERN DISCOMFORT
    SUDDEN DEATH
    HIGH HEARTS
    STARTING FROM SCRATCH: A DIFFERENT KIND OF WRITERS’ MANUAL
    BINGO
    VENUS ENVY
    DOLLEY: A NOVEL OF DOLLEY MADISON IN LOVE AND IN WAR
    RIDING SHOTGUN
    RITA WILL: MEMOIR OF A LITERARY RABBLE-ROUSER
    LOOSE LIPS
    ALMA MATER
    HOTSPUR
    FULL CRY
    OUTFOXED
    THE HUNT BALL
    THE HOUNDS AND THE FURY
    THE TELL-TALE HORSE
    THE SAND CASTLE
    HOUNDED TO DEATH

SANTA CLAWED
    A Bantam Book / November 2008

    Published by
    Bantam Dell
    A Division of Random House, Inc.
    New York, New York

    This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

    All rights reserved.
    Copyright © 2008 by American Artists, Inc.
    Illustrations copyright © 2008 by Michael Gellatly

    Bantam Books is a registered trademark of Random House, Inc., and the colophon is a trademark of Random House, Inc.

    Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
    Brown, Rita Mae.
    Santa clawed: a Mrs. Murphy mystery / Rita Mae