Sidney Chambers and The Shadow of Death (The Grantchester Mysteries)

then, as soon as you’ve done that, a hundred others spring up to take its place. The process is never-ending.’
    ‘We have to keep faith.’
    ‘I think that’s rather easier for you to say than me.’
    ‘I don’t mean religious faith. I mean faith in our own abilities. We have to do the best we can with the talents we have, Geordie. The future is too unpredictable for anxiety.’
    ‘And yet the anxieties come.’
    ‘Let us concentrate on the game, Geordie.’ Sidney threw a five and a three. ‘I can see that you need cheering up.’
    ‘I’m hardly going to cheer up if you keep winning all the time.’
    Sidney leaned forward over the board. ‘Do you want me to lose deliberately? I am sure you would find that rather insulting.’
    Keating smiled. ‘I don’t mind, Sidney, there are worse things in life.’
    ‘Indeed there are. And we must remember that there is much to look forward to: Christmas, for example, and your birthday too. A double celebration.’
    ‘I don’t know about that. I like the hullabaloo and the excitement of the children but Cathy always gets tense when her mother comes to stay. She feels judged all the time.’
    ‘Judge not that ye be not judged.’
    ‘Well, Sidney, perhaps you could come round and tell my mother-in-law that? You would be welcome at any time.’
    ‘That’s very kind of you.’
    ‘But what are your plans, Sidney? Will you be seeing Amanda?’
    ‘I think so. Although she gets very booked up at this time of year.’
    ‘I would imagine you had first call.’
    ‘Not necessarily. She leads a pretty active social life. I am sure she will marry soon.’
    Inspector Keating pretended, without success, to return to the game. ‘I have told you what I think about that.’
    ‘We are friends; nothing more.’
    ‘That’s a good enough reason, isn’t it?’
    ‘I don’t think so. I have thought about it, as you know only too well; but I don’t think it could possibly work. Her world is too different; and, of course, in many ways, I am married to my job.’
    ‘But you can’t be a bachelor for ever, Sidney. It’s too lonely.’
    ‘Perhaps that is the price of the priesthood?’
    ‘Nonsense, man. There are plenty of married clergy. You see them all over the place.’
    Sidney was beginning to feel uncomfortable. He didn’t like talking about himself and realised that he found it far easier to ask questions than answer them. ‘I am aware of that.’
    ‘So what are you going to do?’
    Reluctantly, Sidney realised that it was time for a little confession. ‘Well, Geordie, to tell you the truth, I thought that, after Christmas, I might have a little holiday.’
    ‘But where on earth would you go to at this time of year?’
    ‘I was thinking of Germany.’
    ‘I see.’ Inspector Keating gave Sidney one of his steady looks. ‘You’ve kept very quiet about that. You’re going to see Hildegard Staunton?’
    ‘I hope so.’
    ‘Does Amanda know of your plans?’
    ‘Not at the moment, no.’
    ‘And are you going to tell her?’
    ‘I am sure she won’t mind.’
    ‘I, however, am sure she will mind.’ Inspector Keating finished his pint. ‘Well, well, well. Your secret is safe with me.’
    ‘It is not a secret, Geordie.’
    ‘I think it should be. Still waters run deep, eh?’
    ‘I haven’t been to Germany for quite a while.’
    ‘I don’t think you are going for the landscape or the beer. Admit it, man.’
    ‘I don’t really want to talk about it, Geordie. I may have got completely the wrong idea. But there is something about Hildegard. I don’t know how to express it: but when I was with her, I felt at home.’
    ‘I will expect a full report.’
    ‘I am not sure I can promise you that, Geordie. We must have some secrets from each other, surely?’
    ‘I’ve told you before, Sidney. We can have no secrets, and we are never off duty.’
    The publican threw another log on to the hearth and the fire blazed up once more, giving a comforting glow to the faces of the two drinkers. The two men resumed their backgammon and played in companionable silence until Sidney threw a four and a three to gain yet another unlikely victory.
    ‘I don’t know how you do it,’ his friend complained.
    ‘Think of it as part of the game we call life,’ Sidney replied.
    ‘It’s not much of a game if you keep winning all the time.’ Geordie Keating leaned back in his chair and accepted defeat. ‘Sometimes, Sidney, I really do think that you must have God on your