Swan Dive

speech.”
    ”What did Teri say to that?”
    ”She went crazy. She said something like, ‘You bastard! You didn’t say nothing about that. You just said we needed an ordinary guy for the porn people.’ Marsh says to her, ‘You stupid cunt, you’d believe rain ain’t wet.’ ”
    ”Then what?”
    ”Then...” Chris dropped his head till all that kept his jaw from his chest were the chins underneath. ”Then she said, ‘Well, you ain’t doing this with me,’ all defiant-like, then she stomped up and across the bed, and made to go in the closet, like after the camera. And Marsh, that, that... pig says, ‘Even better,’ and shoots her. I mean, he just points and shoots, no warning or nothing.”
    Chris paused, and I thought about Holt, playing me along. Marsh was wearing the gloves to avoid leaving fingerprints and to fool a later paraffin test on his hands. Which means that since Marsh fired the gun with the gloves on, there would have been evidence of that on the gloves themselves. Which Holt conveniently neglected to tell me.
    Chris said, ”You sure you want to hear all of this?”
    ”Yes.”
    He closed his eyes, but continued. ”I go crazy, I mean, I’m already down on all fours, and he’s treating me like shit and just shot the girl and probably’s gonna shoot me. So I come up in a three-point stance, John, like back on the team, and I go at him, pumping like the coach said, all with the legs, not the head, the legs. I’m watching his stomach, so I can hit him solid, I don’t see his face, but I pop him good and hard and I hear the gun go off again but I don’t feel nothing and then I realize glass is breaking and I look up and he’s... he’s not there anymore.” Chris shook his head vigorously, as though groggy after an impact. ”The window’s broken and he’s gone.”
    ”You left the gun there, Chris. My gun.”
    He opened his eyes and raised his hand. ”John, I swear to God, I didn’t know that. He didn’t say nothing about it. And, anyway, I thought it went out the window with him.”
    ”What did you do next?”
    ”I went over to Teri, to see if she was... but she was dead. Jeez, John, I could see her brains, like they were leaking.... In the closet, he’s got the camera, some clothes, and a suitcase. All I was thinking is, ‘He’s got me on tape,’ but I don’t know nothing about those cameras, so I just yanked out the suitcase and opened it up. He had some kinda camera case in there, but it was closed and I didn’t care, I just wanted to get out. I pulled his clothes off the hanger, hers too, think, and I stuffed the clothes, the camera, and everything in the suitcase. I think I must have busted the legs on the tripod just to make it fit. I closed up the suitcase and threw my clothes on and got the hell out. I heard the elevator moving, so I used the stairs, but by the time I’d gone down maybe five flights I was breathing so hard I was afraid I’d pass out, so I went back into the hall on whatever floor it was and took the elevator back down to the lobby. Nobody was in it by then, I guess everybody was out and around the corner, gawking at the body. I just walked out and kept walking till I got to my car.”
    ”What did you do with the suitcase?”
    ”I put it in the trunk and started driving, driving home, I mean. When I got partway, I realized I’d have to get rid of it, so I stopped at Revere Beach , the stretch with the wicked riptide. I ran out onto the sand with the thing and waited for two big beauties to roll in together, in the moonlight you could see them real clear. Then I heaved it as far as I could. It rode out but it floated at first. Jeez, John, I never fucking thought of that, it was so heavy, with the camera and all. But then it sank, lower and lower as it washed out, till I couldn’t see it anymore, even with the moon. Then I went back to the car and drove home.”
    ”Chris, you’re the lawyer, but it seems to me that what happened in the room was self-defense. Why did you pack and run like that?”
    ”John, jeez, look at things the way they are, willya? I’m with a prostitute, and she gets shot, and I send the guy through the window. You think they’re gonna believe me?”
    ”Maybe.”
    ”So okay, so even if they do, the truth’s worse than a good lie. I lose my ticket, John. The Overseers have to ull my license, which is the only thing I got going for me. Also, the truth is that I’m everything that Eleni hates the most, the Greek