Tales of the City 06 - Sure of You

be losing you guys.” The doorman wasn’t giving up.
    “Well, it hasn’t really been…”
    “We don’t have to go with her,” Shawna offered brightly.
    “Puppy.” Brian gave his daughter a scolding look before turning back to the doorman. “Nothing’s really definite.”
    He pulled away from the curb, causing his interrogator to slap the side of the Jeep and say: “Hang in there.” There was a sympathetic, man-to-man air about this, which made Brian wonder if the guy had already guessed the score.
    “What did I do wrong?” his daughter asked.
    “Nothing.” He couldn’t bring himself to reprimand her for telling the truth, or at least her slant on it.
    “When is she going?”
    “Next week, Puppy.”
    “Will you come back then?”
    “Sure. Of course. I told you that.” He reached across and wiggled one of the tight little braids Nguyet had woven for her. “Where else would I go, silly?”
    “I dunno.” Shawna ducked her eyes. “Are you still mad at Mary Ann?”
    “No. I’m just…I’ve never been really mad at her, Puppy. We had a misunderstanding. It makes me sad to be around her now, so I’m gonna stay with Michael and Thack until she leaves.”
    “Will you be sad when she’s gone?”
    He hesitated. “Some. Yes.”
    “I don’t want you to be.”
    He looked at her. “I’ll give it a shot.”
    She was distracted by a passing station wagon. A back Lab was in the back seat, poking his rubbery nose through a crack in the window. She waved at it briefly before turning back to him. “Does Michael have AIDS now?” she asked.
    “No, Puppy. Michael is just HIV positive. Remember when he explained that to you?”
    “Yes.”
    “Why’d you ask, then?”
    The child shrugged. “Mary Ann said he was sick. She said you were taking care of him.”
    “Oh.” So that was the excuse she’d used. “He had an upset stomach for a while, but he’s fine now.”
    “Oh.”
    “It was just a regular ol’ upset stomach. Just like you have sometimes.”
    She looked out the window again.
    “Michael would tell you if he was really sick. Don’t worry about that.”
    “O.K.,” she said.

    That afternoon, as they clipped the brown spikes off the yuccas, he told Michael about Shawna’s distress. “She was so confused, poor kid.”
    “I’m not surprised,” said Michael.
    “What do you mean?”
    “Well…she’s pretty much in the dark about this, isn’t she?”
    There was the suggestion of negligence to this, which annoyed Brian. “Look…I’ve been perfectly straight with her. I wasn’t the one who fed her some cock-and-bull story about taking care of you.”
    “I realize that.”
    “Well…you sounded pretty judgmental.”
    “Sorry.”
    “It’s typical of her not to level with the kid, to make it even worse by…”
    “She’s got to tell her something, Brian.”
    “Tell her the truth, then. Tell her I’m hurt and pissed. What’s so difficult about that?”
    “Is that what you told her?”
    “No…not exactly…”
    “O.K., then. She’s just trying to spare Shawna’s feelings.”
    “And I’m not, huh?”
    “Brian…”
    “It’s my fault her mother’s running off to join the goddamn circus. I get it.”
    “I’m not talking about fault, Brian. If you would just sit down and hash this out with her…”
    “Have you talked to her or something? Did she tell you to say this?”
    “No.”
    “She’s been giving you grief, hasn’t she? What did she do? Accuse you of defecting?”
    Michael rolled his eyes. “I haven’t talked to her once since you left.”
    “Well…”
    “I do think it’s time you grew up a little and talked to her. You’re only making things worse.”
    “Is that right?”
    “The longer you put it off…”
    “Thanks, Michael. I get the point. Just what I needed—another nagging wife.”
    Michael stuck his clippers in his belt and began to walk away.
    “Wait,” said Brian. “I’m sorry, man. Don’t listen to me. I don’t mean this shit.”
    “I can’t handle it, Brian. I don’t know what to tell you anymore.”
    “You don’t have to. I don’t expect you to.”
    “You haven’t stopped pumping me all week. I can’t keep playing middleman like this.”
    “When have I ever…?”
    “Oh, Jesus, Brian, for years and years. I’d like to have a nickel for every time you’ve asked me what she really thinks about something.”
    “Because she talks to you, man. She never tells me shit. You know stuff about my life that I don’t even