The Bride Wore Black Leather

persuade anyone of anything. Who could talk the hind leg off a donkey, then use it to club the poor beast’s head in. I have extensive mental training, from when I was a young man learning my craft with old Carnacki; but even so, I don’t feel I want to test that training against your unnatural gift. So don’t try it on with me, Tommy Oblivion, or I will punch you right in the throat.”
    And all the time I was speaking my mind, and the Oblivion brothers were listening to me, I was edging closer to the nearest bookshelf. I couldn’t hide my movements from them, but as long as I was still talking and not running, they stayed where they were. Confident that they were blocking the way to the exit. But I wasn’t thinking about running. Not yet. I grabbed the nearest book, feeling it squirm in my hand, and threw it at Larry. He flinched away as the book swooped angrily about his head, flapping its leather covers like stiff wings. Tommy cried out piteously and put both hands up to protect his head. He’d always had a thing about anything getting in his hair.
    Larry grabbed the book out of mid air, holding it firmly with both hands. The book fought him, struggling fiercely, strange energies sparking and spitting on the air around it; but Larry was dead, and the book couldn’t hurt him. He forced the book closed with his dead strength and pushed it firmly back into its proper gap on the shelf. He then backed quickly away, while all the books on that shelf vied to make the loudest and most obscene noises of defiance. Larry smiled briefly.
    “I may be dead, but I still have my reflexes. Tommy, will you please put your hands down! The danger, what there was of it, has quite definitely passed.”
    And while they were both distracted by all of that, I slipped behind the bookshelf, put my shoulder to the wooden frame, and threw all my strength and weight against it. The bookshelf resisted, but I insisted, and with a lurch and a groan the whole bookshelf tilted to one side, then fell onto Tommy and Larry Oblivion. They both looked round to see it coming, but not in time to do anything about it. The heavy weight of the packed bookshelves slammed down onto both of them, throwing them to the floor and pinning them there. Tommy cried out piteously again. Larry didn’t. He had his pride. And besides, unlike Tommy, he was dead and therefore felt no pain.
    When I was sure they were both safely pinned to the floor, I moved forward to smile down at them.
    “You bastard,” said Larry.
    “Takes one to know one,” I said. “Now, will you listen to me?”
    Larry turned his head slowly to look at Tommy. “Can you move?”
    “Not in the least. Haven’t got any leverage to work with. You?”
    “No.” Larry looked up at me. “All right. What have you got to say for yourself, you murderous little shit?”
    I explained the circumstances of Julien Advent’s death in some detail, making sure they understood about the Sun King, and what he was planning to do while everyone was distracted running after me. When I was finished, Larry looked at Tommy.
    “Do you believe him?”
    “Stranger things have happened,” said Tommy.
    “Our enemies have always profited by turning us against each other,” said Larry.
    “And if the Sun King is the one responsible for Julien’s death, I want his heart’s blood,” said Tommy.
    “You always were the vicious one in the family,” Larry said fondly.
    I looked at them both thoughtfully. “You’re both being very reasonable. Don’t you feel the Sun King’s power, pressing on you not to believe me?”
    “No,” said Larry. “I have to say . . . I don’t feel as utterly convinced of your guilt as I did before. Could be the Library’s defences, protecting us from the Sun King’s influence. And, of course, we are more resistant than most. Tommy being existential, and me being dead.”
    “It affected Dead Boy,” I said.
    Larry sniffed loudly. “That boy’s brains have been leaking out his ears for years. I’m amazed he can still put one foot in front of the other without consulting a manual. All right, say we do believe in you. That you were framed by the Sun King. How do we find the bastard?”
    “My gift can’t find him anywhere,” I said. “He’s either protected by his power or by that of the Entities.”
    “That leaves simple deduction,” said Larry. “We are supposed to be detectives, after all. Where would he go, in the Nightside? What would he see as a weak spot?