The Flesh Cartel #5: Wins and Losses

thought were soothing circles over the skin of Mat’s ass, his touch lighting a path of fire. Or maybe he didn’t think they were soothing at all, maybe he was only pretending they were. Mimicking kindness and acting out cruelty. Fucker. “Yes?” Nikolai asked.
And God, all Mat wanted to do was tell him what he wanted to hear, say whatever would make the pain stop. “You’re always going to be . . .” In charge. In control. One step ahead of me.
My master. He almost puked just thinking it.
Nikolai belted him again, three times in rapid succession. “Finish your sentence.”
“This game is rigged,” Mat gasped out. “Can’t fight back, can’t win. You win. Always.”
The rubbing hand came back, and Mat clenched his watering eyes shut and pressed his face into the blanket, trying not to whimper loudly enough for Nikolai to hear. “You know,” Nikolai said, “winning doesn’t always mean being the alpha dog. It doesn’t always mean fighting. Or . . .” A pause, one finger trailing musingly up his ass to the small of his back. “Or maybe you don’t know. Let me share something with you, Mathias. Something you can use when you leave here: Sometimes winning isn’t about fighting; it’s about not fighting. It’s about understanding what your opponent wants. And maybe you’ll find a way to keep it from him without him noticing, or maybe you’ll find a way to give it to him that costs you nothing. Either way, you win. You win and he doesn’t even know he’s lost. Which is a win in and of itself.”
Yeah, you would say that.
Was Nikolai mindfucking Dougie this way, too? God, at least Dougie was smart enough—had the background, too— to see what this was and withstand it. Mat was doomed. If he ever got out, he’d be a fucking mental patient. Irreparable. Beyond recognition.
No.
Stronger. Smarter. Tougher.
“Do you truly think I’m trying to . . . to what, Mathias? Con you? What could I possibly have to gain from teaching you to undermine my own authority? Think about it. What do I want here? Right now, in this moment. Why am I here?”
“ To fuck with me?” And yeah, he could take that however he wanted because it’d probably be right.
Nikolai sighed, took a single step back, and let Mat have it with the belt again. Five, six, maybe seven strikes, impossible to tell—just one giant knot of heat and pain and noise. “Try again,” he said when he’d finished. “Do mind the consequences of mocking my efforts.”
What did he fucking want? “I don’t know, okay? I don’t know!”
“You do.” Stern now, like a disappointed father. Mat was halfway to begging him not to hit him again before he caught himself and shoved that bullshit down deep. He hurt so much. He was so fucking tired of hurting.
Nikolai touched gentle fingers to his burning ass again. “What are we doing now?”
“Talking?”
“Yes!” Now the pleased father. “About what?”
Winning. Dougie. Your property. It hit him then, clear as the belt. “The list,” he said, and his relief was so huge he nearly choked on it. “My list. Things to live for.”
“Very good,” Nikolai said. Practically crooned. “So I’m here to understand you, yes? And perhaps to help you understand yourself ? So we might both learn what motivates you?”
“Sure, why not.”
Nikolai hit him again. He supposed he’d seen that coming.
“So how can you give me that without it costing you anything? Or not give me that without me knowing?”
Lie. I can lie. But Jesus, no way could he say that out loud. Nikolai wouldn’t like it . . . would he?
Nikolai stepped into Mat’s field of vision, squatted until they were face to face. “I see the answer in your eyes, Mathias. Don’t be afraid. Carry it with you, and hold it close, and when you’re gone from here, use it when you can.” He stood, patted Mat’s shoulder. “Never with me, of course. I can’t help you if you lie to me. And if I catch you . . .” He shook his head. Tsked.
“Consequences?” Mat said.
“What do you know,” Nikolai said with a grin. “The boy learns.” He circled back to the foot of the bed, out of Mat’s eyesight, skimmed fingertips over the throbbing skin of his ass. “And what if I wanted to fuck you now, Mathias? How would you give me that without losing?”
Shit. Of course. Of course it was going to lead to that. “I guess it’d depend why you wanted to fuck me,” he said. “Hurt me? Humiliate me? Put me in my place?”
“Because I’m sexually