The Merchant of Menace

until she was older. The pictures of Patty Sue with Pet, and there were a lot of them, were the old Patty Sue, laughing and happy. Those with Sam and Patty Sue alone were serious. A filmed history of a marriage falling apart. Someday Jane might have to look through her photos and see if her own marriage had gone to pieces in the photo record.
    Or maybe she wouldn’t.
    The last picture was of Pet’s third birthday. She was sitting on Patty Sue’s lap with a birthday cake in front of them and icing all over Pet’s face. Patty Sue was wiping away tears of laughter. Sam wasn’t in the picture.
    “Pet, your scrapbook is wonderful. You’re so lucky to have all these pictures and I’m sure you’ll treasure them all your life,“ Jane said.
    “Thank you, Mrs. Jeffry,“ Pet said, closing the album and putting it in a plastic bag that protected it. Just then Todd, still playing at the computer in the den, called to her and she excused herself quite properly and left the room.
    Too bad Pet hadn’t gotten to have her mother a little longer, Jane thought. She might have absorbed more of the woman’s sense of fun and frivolity. Pet did need to be tickled sometimes and Jane guessed that Patty Sue had been a tickling kind of mother.
    “Sam, I have to get home,“ she said, going into the kitchen. “I’m worried about my water pipes. The wind’s picked up and that’ll make the cold worse.“
    “I’ll drive you home,“ he said, closing the door on the dishwasher. The kitchen was spotless.
    “No, it’s only three houses away. No use you going out, too.”
    Luckily, the mild fight to get Todd away from the computer game and into his outerwear prevented any extended good-byes or anything more specific than Sam’s vague remark about doing this again someday. Todd raced away up the street, while Jane followed as quickly as she could without risking a fall.
    As she came in the kitchen door, Todd greeted her with a grim face. “Mom, old thing, you’re not going to like this.”
    “Not the pipes!”
    He nodded. “I went in the guest bathroom and heard a noise in the basement. Water everywhere.“
    “Perfect! Just perfect! Sunday night with broken pipes!“
    “Go ahead, Mom. Say ‘shit.’ “
    “ Shit!”
    It didn’t help. But it made Todd yelp with laughter.
    “Mrs. Pargeter, may I speak with Bruce.“ After a short pause, Bruce answered.
    “Bruce, it’s Jane Jeffry. I hate myself for asking this—I really know all about keeping pipes from freezing and I left the water running, but Katie didn’t know and turned it off and what I don’t know is where the little handle to turn the flow off is. I’ve been slogging around in the basement—“ She could hear her voice rising to an hysterical squeak but couldn’t help it.
    “I’ll find the shut-off valve for you,“ Bruce said calmly. “Can’t fix the pipe tonight though.“
    “But we’ll have other water, right?“
    “Maybe. I’ll have to see the system.”
    Jane stomped around, looking for another flashlight as hers was already going dim and she was afraid to turn on the basement light. Water and electricity didn’t go together well, she’d heard. Bruce arrived quickly and seemed quite confident that it was no big deal, even though he hadn’t looked over the situation yet.
    “Why’s it dark down here?“ he asked at the head of the basement stairs. Jane started to explain her understanding of electricity, but Bruce laughed, flipped on the basement light and went down the steps. He was back in less than five minutes.
    “You’re lucky. That guest bath is an addition to the original plan and has its own shut-off valve. I’ll get back in the morning and fix it.“
    “I have water everywhere else? What a relief! Oh, Bruce, I’m so thankful.”
    He brushed off her thanks. “I finished up Mrs. Newton’s kitchen today and nobody usually wants anything done over the holidays except emergencies like this. Glad to do it. See you tomorrow.”
    Weak with relief, Jane went to the comfort of her favorite squashy chair in the living room and collapsed. It was horrible to contemplate how much worse it might have been. A houseful of kids, last-minute holiday activities, and no water! Yikes!
    It was Sunday night and she deserved to veg out. She wondered what was on Masterpiece Theatre. It was a measure of how hectic life had been the last couple days that she couldn’t remember. She hoped it was something very soothing. A Jane Austen movie, maybe. She