The Narrows

about it and went out to California right away. I'm sorry. I should have told you."
    Rachel looked down at her hands. Terry McCaleb had been her friend and colleague. He was one of the em-paths. She felt a sudden and deep sense of loss, despite the fact that she had not spoken to him in years. Their shared experiences had left them bonded for life and now that life, for him, was gone.
    "Okay, people, let's take a break here," Alpert said. "Fifteen minutes and then back in here. Brass, can you callback?"
    "I will. I've got more to report."
    "Talk to you then."
    They all filed out to get coffee or use the restrooms. To leave Rachel alone.
    "Are you all right, Agent Walling?" Alpert asked.
    She looked up at him. The last thing she would take would be comfort from him.
    "I'm fine," she said, moving her eyes back to the blank TV screen. Rachel remained in the conference room by herself. Her initial shock gave way to a wave of guilt coming up behind her like a following sea. Terry McCaleb had attempted to contact her over the years. She had gotten the messages but had never responded. She had sent him a card and a note when he was in the hospital recovering from the transplant. That had been five or six years ago. She couldn't remember. She did remember specifically deciding not to put a personal return address on the envelope. At the time she told herself it was because she wasn't going to be stuck in Minot for very long. But she knew then as she knew now that the real reason was she didn't want the connection. She didn't want the questions about the choices she had made. She didn't want that link to the past.
    Now she didn't have to worry, the link was forever gone.
    The door opened and Cherie Dei looked in.
    "Rachel, do you want a bottle of water?"
    "Sure, that would be nice. Thank you."
    "Tissues?"
    "No, that's all right, I'm not crying."
    "Be right back."
    Dei closed the door.
    "I don't cry," Rachel said to no one.
    She put her elbows on the table and held her hands over her face. In the darkness she saw a memory. She and Terry on a case. They weren't partners but Backus had put them together on this one. It was a crime scene analysis. A bad one. A mother and daughter tied up and thrown into the water, the girl squeezing so hard on a crucifix it left its full impression on her hand. The mark was still there when the bodies were found. Terry was working with the photos and Rachel went to the cafeteria to get coffee. When she came back she could tell he had been crying. That was when she knew he was an empath, that he was her kind.
    Dei came back into the room and put a bottle of spring water and a plastic cup down in front her.
    "You okay?"
    "Yes, fine. Thanks for the water."
    "It was quite a shock. I didn't really know him and it bowled me over when the word spread."
    Rachel just nodded. She didn't want to talk about it. The speakerphone rang and Rachel reached for it ahead of Dei. She picked up the handset rather than push the teleconference button. This way she could speak privately at first to Doran-at least, Doran's side of it would not be overheard.
    "Brass?"
    "Rachel, hi, I am so sorry I didn't-" "It's all right. It isn't your job to keep me informed of everything."
    "I know but this I should have told you about."
    "It was probably in one of the bulletins and I just missed it. It's just strange finding out about it this way."
    "I know. I'm sorry."
    "So you went to the funeral?"
    "The service, yes. It was out on the island where he lived. Catalina. It was really beautiful there and really sad."
    "Were there many agents?"
    "No, not too many. It was kind of hard to get to. You have to take a ferry. But there were a few and there were some cops and family and friends. Clint Eastwood was there. I think he took his own helicopter out."
    The door opened and Alpert came in. He seemed renewed, as if he had been sucking on pure oxygen during the break. The other two agents, Zigo and Gunning, followed him in and sat down.
    "We're ready to start," Rachel said to Doran. "I've got to put you on the screen now."
    "Okay, Rachel. We'll talk later."
    Rachel handed the phone to Alpert, who set up the teleconference. Doran appeared on the screen, looking more tired than before.
    "Okay," Alpert said. "We ready to continue?"
    After no one said a word he continued.
    "All right then, what do these prints on the boat mean?"
    "It means we've got to find out when and why McCaleb was out in the desert before he died," Dei said.
    "And it