The Redemption of Callie & Kayden

highlighters. I pick it up, dial Kayden’s number, and wait for his voicemail message to come on.
    “Hey, this is Kayden, I’m way too busy to take your call right now, so please leave a message and maybe you’ll be lucky enough that I’ll call you back.” There’s sarcasm in his voice like he thinks he’s being funny and I smile, missing him so badly it pierces my heart.
    I listen to it over and over again until I can hear the underlying pain in his sarcasm, the one that carries his secrets. Eventually, I hang up and flop back on my bed, wishing I could travel back in time and not let Kayden find out that it was Caleb who raped me.
    “God, what time is it?” Violet sits up in her bed and blinks her bloodshot eyes at the leather-band watch on her wrist. She shakes her head and gathers her black-and-red-streaked hair out of her face. She gazes out the window at the snow and then looks at me. “How long have I been out?”
    I shrug, staring up at the ceiling. “I think, like, ten hours?”
    She throws the blanket off herself and climbs out of bed. “Fuck, I missed my chemistry class.”
    “You take chemistry?” I don’t mean for it to sound so rude, but the shock of her taking chemistry comes through in my voice. Violet and I have shared a room for three months, and from what I can tell, she likes to party and she likes guys.
    She gives me a dirty look as she slips her arm through the sleeve of her leather jacket. “What? You don’t think I can party
and
be smart?”
    I shake my head. “No, that’s not what I meant. I just—”
    “I know what you meant—what you think of me, and everyone else thinks of me.” She snatches her bag from the desk, sniffs her shirt, and shrugs. “But some advice: Maybe you shouldn’t judge people by their looks.”
    “I don’t,” I tell her, feeling bad. “I’m sorry if you think I judged you.”
    She collects her phone from the desk and tosses it into her bag, then heads for the door. “Listen, if some guy named Jesse comes by, can you pretend that you haven’t seen me all day?”
    “Why?” I ask, sitting up.
    “Because I don’t want him to know I’ve been here.” She opens the door and glances back over her shoulder. “God, you’ve been a little snippy lately. When I first met you, I thought you were like a doormat. But lately, you’ve been kind of cranky.”
    “I know,” I say quietly, with my chin tucked down. “And I’m sorry. I’ve just been having a rough few weeks.”
    She pauses in the doorway, eyeing me over. “Are you…” She shifts her weight, looking uncomfortable. Whatever she’s trying to say seems to be hard for her. “Are you okay?”
    I nod and something crosses over her face, maybe pain, and for a second I wonder if Violet’s okay. But then she shrugs and walks out, slamming the door behind her. I release a loud breath and lie back down on the bed. The need to shove my finger down my throat and free the heavy, foul feelings in my stomach strangles me. Damn it. I need therapy. I reach for my phone without sitting up and dial my therapist’s number, aka Seth, and my best friend in the whole world.
    “I love you to death, Callie,” Seth says as he answers after three rings. “But I think I’m about to get lucky so this better be important.”
    I scrunch my nose as my cheeks heat. “It’s not… I just wanted to see what was up. But if you’re busy, I’ll let you go.”
    He sighs. “I’m sorry, that came out a lot ruder than I planned. If you
really
need me, I can totally talk. You know you’re my first priority.”
    “Are you with Greyson?” I ask.
    “Of course,” he replies with humor in his tone. “I’m not a man-whore skank.”
    A giggle slips through my lips and I’m amazed how much better I feel just from talking to him. “I promise I’m fine. I’m just bored and was looking for an escape from my English book.” I shove the book off the bed and roll onto my stomach, propping myself up onto my elbows. “I’ll let you go.”
    “Are you really, really sure?”
    “I’m one hundred percent sure. Now go have fun.”
    “Oh, trust me. I’m planning on it,” he replies and I laugh, but it hurts my stomach. I start to hang up when he adds, “Callie, if you need to hang out with someone, you could call Luke… You two are kind of going through the same thing. I mean, with missing Kayden and not really understanding.”
    I bite at my fingernails. I’ve spent time with Luke, but I’m still