The Second Book of Lankhmar

didn't think to swipe it. Now jump to it, Reetha!”
    Suddenly realizing the strength of her bargaining position, she merely leaned closer to him and smiling archly though lovingly, asked, “With what doll-tiny bitch have you been consorting now? No, you needn't answer that, but before I stir me to help you, you must give me six hairs from your darling head. I have good reason for my request.”
    The Mouser started to argue insanely with her, then thought better of it and snicked off with Scalpel a small switch of his locks and laid then in her huge, crisscross furrowed, gleaming palm, where they were fine as baby hairs, though slightly longer and darker than most.
    She stood up briskly, marched to the night table, and dropped them in Glipkerio's night draught. Then dusting off her hands above the goblet, she looked around. The most suitable object she could see for the Mouser's purpose was the golden casket of unset jewels. She lugged it into place against the small door, taking the Mouser's word as to where the small door exactly was.
    “That should hold them for a bit,” he said, greedily noting for future reference the rainbow gems bigger than his fists, “but ‘twere best you also fetch—”
    Dropping to her knees, she asked somewhat wistfully, “Aren't you ever going to be big again?”
    “Don't boom the floor! Yes, of course! In an hour or less, if I can trust my tricksy, treacherous wizard. Now, Reetha, while I dress me, please fetch—”
    A key chinked dulcetly and a bolt thudded softly in its channel. The Mouser felt himself whirled through the air by and with Reetha onto the soft springy white bed, and a white translucent sheet whirled over them.
    He heard the big door open.
    At that moment a hand on his head pressed him firmly down into a squat and as he was about to protest, Reetha whispered—it was a growl like light surf—"Don't make a bump in the sheet. Whatever happens, hold still and hide for your dear life's sake.”
    A voice like battle trumpets blared then, making the Mouser glad of what shielding the sheet gave his ears. “The nasty girl's crawled in my bed! Oh, the disgust of it! I feel faint. Wine! Ah! Aaarrrggghh —” There came ear-shaking chokings, spewings, and spittings, and then the battle trumpets again, somewhat muffled, as if stuffed with flannel, though even more enraged: “The filthy and demonic slut has put hairs in my drink! Oh whip her, Samanda, until she's everywhere welted like a bamboo screen! Lash her until she licks my feet and kisses each toe for mercy!”
    Then another voice, this one like a dozen huge kettle-drums, thundering through the sheet and pounding the Mouser's tinied goldleaf-thin eardrums. “That I will, little master. Nor heed you, if you ask I desist. Come out of there, girl, or must I whip you out?”
    Reetha scrambled toward the head of the bed, away from that voice. The Mouser followed crouching after her, though the mattress heaved like a white-decked ship in a storm, the sheet figuring as an almost deck-low ceiling of fog. Then suddenly that fog was whirled away, as if by a supernal wind, and there glared down the gigantic double red-and-black sun of Samanda's face, inflamed by liquor and anger, and of her globe-dressed, pin-transfixed black hair. And the sun had a black tail—Samanda's raised whip.
    The Mouser bounded toward her across the disordered bed, brandishing Scalpel and still lugging under his other arm the gray bundle of his clothes.
    The whip, which had been aimed at Reetha, changed direction and came whistling toward him. He sprang straight up with all his strength and it passed just under his naked feet like a black dragon's tail, the whistling abruptly lowering in pitch. By good luck keeping his footing as he came down, he leaped again toward Samanda, stabbed her with Scalpel in her black-wool-draped huge kneecap, and sprang down to the parquet floor.
    Like a browned-iron thunderbolt, a great ax-head bit into the wood close by him, jarring him to his teeth. Glipkerio had snatched a light battle-ax from his weapon-rack with surprising speed and wielded it with unlikely accuracy.
    The Mouser darted under the bed, raced across that—to him—low-ceilinged dark wide portico, emerged on the other side and doubled swiftly back around the foot of the bed to slash at the back of Glipkerio's ankle.
    But this ham-stringing stroke failed when Glipkerio turned around. Samanda, limping just a little, came to her overlord's side.