The Silent Girl

than the hoi polloi.
    JANE
    Good one, Maura.
    MAURA
    You don’t even know what it means.
    PIKE
    (helpfully)
    It means common. Literal translation is, “the great unwashed.”
    JANE
    (heated)
    Classy, Maura. Hide your insults in Latin.
    MAURA
    (equally heated)
    It’s Greek.
    Pike realizes this is getting serious. He dials his cell.
JANE
PIKE
A geek who knows Greek. You realize how ridiculous you sound? You know, people laugh at you behind your back.
   (to phone)
I have a rapidly escalating assault and battery in the morgue …
Really? And people call you a bitch behind yours.
What’s the weapon? Uh … their mouths!
    Pike has a light-bulb realization: the job he wants is within his grasp. As he turns on the phone’s video camera –
    PIKE
     … yes, I’m maintaining a safe distance … Excuse me. Have to put you on speaker —-
    JANE
    At least my father doesn’t stab people with ice picks when he’s pissed off!
    As Cavanaugh BURSTS in –
    MAURA
    At least my father didn’t move to Florida to sleep with some floozie he met in a pizza parlor.
    CAVANAUGH
    (grabs iPhone from Pike)
    Gimme that.
    MAURA
    Or was it a massage parlor?
    JANE
    Oh, look at you: going all trailer-trash-Snookie —-
    MAURA
    I watched that show once! Once! It was ethnographic research!
    Cavanaugh puts two fingers in his mouth, WHISTLES.
    CAVANAUGH
    Hey! Break it up, ladies!
    Jane and Maura STOP in their tracks just as Capt. Connors enters, too.
    CONNORS
    What the hell is happening in your house, Lieutenant?
    CAVANAUGH
    I’ve got it under control.
    CONNORS
    I can see that: a homicide detective and a medical examiner having a cat fight that requires police intervention.
    JANE
    Cat fight? Did you just call a disagreement between female colleagues a cat fight?
    MAURA
    Actually, aggression between felines typically involves —
    JANE
    Oh for the love of Pete, stop.
    CONNORS
    I want Detective Rizzoli placed on leave.
    CAVANAUGH
    I’ll go one step better. Rizzoli, I’m transferring you out of Homicide.
        JANE                                          MAURA
    What?                                            What?
    CAVANAUGH (CONT’D)
    You got 30 seconds to get your ass over to Evidence Management.
    JANE
    Place me on leave! Don’t send me there –
    CAVANAUGH
    Go. Now!
    Jane throws a furious look at Maura before she heads out.
    PIKE
    What about Dr. Isles? She was in the cat fight, too.
    Maura pulls an envelope out of her bag and hands it to Pike.
    MAURA
    You’re in charge now.
    PIKE
    I am?
    CAVANAUGH
    What’s in that envelope?
    MAURA
    My resignation.
    END OF ACT FOUR