The Summer of Sir Lancelot

Nightrider stood fingering his lapel, looking like a saint limbering up for a needle fixture with the sinners.
    ‘Have a grape,‘ Sir Lancelot invited.
    ‘I must speak to you in the strictest confidence.‘
    ‘How's that daughter of yours?‘ Sir Lancelot cut in amiably.
    ‘Felicity? She seems very happy in that post of yours. Extremely so. Though she insists on working outrageously long hours down there. Sometimes I worry about her health. Lancelot, something has occurred to the great detriment - ‘
    ‘And Randolph? Does he know anything good for the Ebor Handicap?‘
    ‘Our hospital has been shamed,‘ Mr Nightrider announced impatiently.
    ‘Indeed?‘
    ‘You‘ve seen the papers? This remarkable business in the City. United Drug falling like that. I lost a quite considerable sum myself, I might add.‘
    ‘Oh, hard luck,‘ Sir Lancelot remarked genially.
    ‘You know why the shares fell, of course?‘
    ‘I wouldn‘t have the slightest — come in! No, young lady, I shall not be needing any occupational therapy. I am quite occupied enough as it is. Good afternoon — how the devil should I know?‘ he ended shortly to his brother-in-law. ‘I‘m not a financier.‘
    ‘There has been a leak,‘ declared Mr Nightrider darkly. ‘This new steroid drug the Professional Unit is working on. Apparently it‘s no good.‘
    ‘The sooner the fact were common knowledge the better, I would think.‘
    ‘But don‘t you understand?‘ Mr Nightrider jumped about testily. ‘Everyone knew United Drug had indirectly put up the money for the research, and would be allowed to produce it. The shares went up enormously. You know what profits can be made from even one successful drug. Look at penicillin.‘
    ‘My dear Geoff, if a number of widows and orphans have been ruined I am extremely sorry, but I fail to see what concern it is of mine. Now I really should like a little sleep. A not unreasonable request, I feel, as this time tomorrow I shall have a ruddy great slit all the way down my back.‘
    ‘But Lancelot! Don‘t you recall the findings were to be kept secret until published by the Research Council next week? Surely you remember the procedure? Somebody at St Swithin‘s has broken professional secrecy. A most distasteful business.‘
    ‘H‘m.‘ Sir Lancelot tugged his beard. ‘One of the lab. technicians, perhaps? Bribed, possibly.‘
    ‘I don‘t know, but I cannot conceive it would be one of the medical staff. That is why I want you to have a word with the Professor. Obviously, in my position I can‘t start some sort of inquisition.‘
    ‘Oh, very well, very well,‘ he agreed wearily. ‘I‘ll raise it when he makes his round this evening. Now if you would have the kindness to leave me in peace - ‘
    ‘Yes, of course. I will say goodbye, Lancelot, in case I don‘t see you again. Before your operation, that is,‘ he added hastily. ‘By the way,‘ he remembered at the door, ‘the cistern is leaking badly again. I really feel you ought to get it repaired for us.‘
    Sir Lancelot lay down. He closed his eyes. But inside his head thoughts revolved and collided like atoms in a cyclotron. After half an hour‘s hot restlessness under his sheet he sat up again.
    ‘I wonder... ‘ he murmured. ‘I wonder.‘
    He picked up the telephone.
    ‘Bank 8080. Thank you. Hello? Lord Itchen there? Sir Lancelot Spratt, a personal friend. Yes, it is fairly urgent. Hello, Kenneth? I wonder it - one moment. Come in! Great Scott, girl, what‘s that?‘
    ‘Your tea, Sir Lancelot,‘ announced the redheaded nurse, setting down a tray.
    ‘But dammit! I‘ve only just had lunch.‘
    ‘Sorry, Sir Lancelot, but the teas are rather early today. Sister thinks the patients sleep so heavily all afternoon they never have a chance to drop off at night.‘
     

14
     
    The patients‘ supper at St Swithin‘s was planned with the same care as the lunch, to provide a sustaining meal which would yet lie lightly on the stomach during the night. Sir Lancelot disposed of his fairly quickly, before starting on certain supplements of his own — a pot of caviar, bottled partridge in aspic, a Camembert, and half a bottle of burgundy. Replacing his brandy behind the barley water afterwards, he settled down with his tooth mug to think deeply about his coming interview with the Professor and Paul Ivors-Smith.
    ‘Enter!‘
    Euphemia came in.
    ‘My dear!‘ exclaimed her uncle.
    He hardly recognized the child. She wore a gold silk