The Truth

said.
    The imp blinked.
    “…nyip…nyapnyip…nyapdit…nyip…” it said.
    “It’s just working its way backwards,” said Mr. Pin.
    “What is this?” said the lawyer.
    “…nyapnyip…sipnyap…nip… is valuable, Mr. Pin. So I will not spin this out. What did you do with the dog? ” Mr. Pin’s finger touched another lever. “…wheedle-wheedle whee… My…clients have long memories and deep pockets. Other killers can be hired. Do you understand me? ”
    There was a tiny “ouch” as the “Off” lever hit the imp on the head.
    Mr. Slant got up and walked across to an ancient cabinet.
    “Would you like a drink, Mr. Pin? I am afraid I have only embalming fluid…”
    “Not yet, Mr. Slant.”
    “…and I think I probably have a banana somewhere…”
    Mr. Slant turned, smiling beatifically, at the sound of the smack of Mr. Pin catching Mr. Tulip’s arm.
    “I told you I’m gonna —ing kill him—”
    “Too late, alas,” said the lawyer, sitting down again. “Very well, Mr. Pin. This is about money, is it?”
    “All we’re owed, plus another fifty thousand.”
    “But you haven’t found the dog.”
    “Nor have the Watch. And they’ve got a werewolf. Everyone’s looking for the dog. The dog’s gone. But that doesn’t matter. This little box matters.”
    “That is very little in the way of evidence…”
    “Really? You asking us about the dog? Talking about killers? I reckon that Vimes character will niggle away at something like that. He doesn’t sound like the sort to let things go.” Mr. Pin smiled humorlessly. “You’ve got stuff on us but, well, between you and me”—he leaned closer—“some of the things we’ve done might be considered, well, tantamount to crimes—”
    “All them —ing murders, for a start,” said Mr. Tulip, nodding.
    “Which, since we are criminals, could be called typical behavior. Whereas,” Pin went on, “you’re a respectable citizen. Doesn’t look good, respectable citizens getting involved in this sort of thing. People talk.”
    “To save…misunderstandings,” said Mr. Slant, “I will do you a draft of—”
    “Jewels,” said Mr. Pin.
    “We like jewels,” said Mr. Tulip.
    “You have made copies of that…thing?” said Slant.
    “I’m not saying anything,” said Mr. Pin, who hadn’t and didn’t even know how. But he took the view that Mr. Slant was in no position to be other than cautious, and it looked as though Mr. Slant thought so, too.
    “I wonder if I can trust you?” said Mr. Slant, as if to himself.
    “Well, you see, it’s like this,” said Mr. Pin, as patiently as he could. His head was feeling worse. “If news got around that we’d betrayed a client, that wouldn’t be good. People would say, you can’t trust a person of that kind of ilk. They do not know how to behave. But if the people we deal with heard we’d scragged a client because the client had not played fair, then they would say to themselves, these are businessmen. They are businesslike. They do business…”
    He stopped, and looked at the shadows in the corner of the room.
    “And?” said Mr. Slant.
    “And…and…the hell with this,” said Mr. Pin, blinking and shaking his head. “Give us the jewels, Slant, or Mr. Tulip’ll do the asking, understand? We’re getting out of here, with your damn dwarfs and vampires and trolls and dead men walking. This city gives me the creeps! So give me the diamonds! Right now!”
    “Very well,” said Mr. Slant. “And the imp?”
    “It goes with us. We get caught, it gets caught. We die mysteriously, then…some people find out about things. When we are safely away…you’re in no position to argue, Slant.” Mr. Pin shuddered. “I am not having a good day!”
    Mr. Slant pulled open a desk drawer and tossed three small velvet bags onto the leather top. Mr. Pin mopped his brow with a handkerchief.
    “Take a look at ’em, Mr. Tulip.”
    There was a pause while both men watched Mr. Tulip pour the gems into one enormous palm. He scrutinized several through an eyeglass. He sniffed at them. He gingerly licked one or two.
    Then he picked four out of the heap and tossed them back to the lawyer.
    “You think I’m some kind of a —ing idiot?” he said.
    “Don’t even think of arguing,” said Mr. Pin.
    “Perhaps the jewelers made a mistake,” said Mr. Slant.
    “Yeah?” said Mr. Pin. His hand darted into his jacket again, but this time came out holding a weapon.
    Mr. Slant looked into the muzzle of a