Too Far 05 - Simple Perfection

under me. Could I handle that kind of pain if she were my wife? It was making me even more vulnerable. I needed time to adjust to having her back. Having a Della who didn’t wake up screaming and one I didn’t worry about all the time.
    “I love you,” she said as we stood there together.
    “I love you more,” I replied. And I meant it. That was what kept me from asking her to marry me. That was my roadblock. I loved her more.
    A knock on the door broke into my thoughts and Della stepped out of my arms to look back at me. “Who could that be?”
    “Not sure. I’ll get it.”

    Jace was pacing back and forth on my front porch when I opened the door. His head snapped up when he saw me. He shook his head and went back to pacing. This was woman trouble. I looked back at Della, who stood watching me from the other end of the hallway.
    “Looks like Jace needs to talk. We’ll be out here if you need me,” I told her.
    A worried frown pinched her forehead but she nodded. “Okay.”
    I closed the door behind me and watched as Jace continued to pace.
    “What’s wrong with Bethy?” I asked. I knew that was the only thing that could get him to pace like a madman.
    He stopped his constant moving and shoved his hands in his pockets. “She’s . . . She wanted to get married. I mentioned it to her and she wanted to. But she’s started to act different lately. So I dropped the marriage thing. I thought that was what made her go crazy. But she’s just getting worse. Hell, what was I supposed to do? I can’t get married if she’s not ready. I sure as hell can’t ask her. I don’t know what I was thinking. Just because Rush and Blaire are playing house doesn’t mean the rest of us are ready.”
    I was going to be here a while. I could tell by the frantic tone in Jace’s voice. I sat down in the swing. “So you’ve changed your mind on the marriage thing? Sounds like it scared Bethy anyway. Maybe you two need more time just being a couple.”
    Jace let out a hard laugh. “Yeah, I thought that, too. But she’s just . . . reverted.”
    “Reverted?” I asked, trying to figure out what in the hell he was talking about.
    “You know, reverted to the way she was before. She’s drinking and wanting to go out partying all the time. She rarely sees Blaire anymore because she said it makes her sad. She wants what Blaire has but she says it’s rare. We can’t measure ourselves against that. But that makes no damn sense. I’ve been in two bar fights in the past week. Two fucking bar fights. Me. I don’t fight, dammit. But she’s forcing me to go save her drunk ass from men who want to touch her.”
    I thought about Della playing with Nate the other day and how sweet she was. But not once had she asked for the same thing. She never pressured me for more. I wasn’t sure what I’d do if she did. I would probably give it to her.
    “Do you want Bethy? Forever? Is she who you see yourself spending your life with?”
    “I did. Before all this. I did. I thought we were ready. But now she’s changed. She’s acting like . . . she’s acting like she did before. When all I wanted to do was fuck her because she was so damn good at it. I was addicted to sex with her. Then she stood up to me and drew a line in the sand and I came barreling through it because I realized, through all that sex, that I had started to care for her. I wanted more than just the sex.”
    Everyone knew this story already. No one had expected it. Jace was a trust fund baby and Bethy was a trailer park baby. The two didn’t seem to fit . . . until they did. “She could be drawing the line in the sand again. Forcing you to pick her.”
    Jace walked over and sat down on a padded bench and dropped his head into his hands. “If I thought that was it I would just propose. I would just ask her to marry me. Because, yeah, I love her. But I think she’s hiding something. I don’t know what. I try to overlook it but there are times—and they’re rare—when she withdraws from me. I can’t pinpoint when it happens. I can’t figure out a reason—she just does. Then suddenly she’s back the next day or a few days later, however long it takes, and she’s my Bethy again. I just . . . she has to tell me everything. She has to explain to me what haunts her and why the hell she thinks going to a honky-tonk dressed like a cowboy’s wet dream is okay. I’m tired of getting into fights with dudes bigger than me.”
    Della never did any of these things.