Touchstone 1 - Stray

12
    Psych 101
    Maze came to see me after lunch, to talk me through what they’d concluded from all the tests. He didn’t tell me anything I hadn’t figured out already: that I must have some ability to find Earth through the spaces, and then travel there, bashing open gates on the way. While asleep. It’s nothing like any ability they’ve encountered before, and since they work out your abilities by looking for known ‘patterns’ in the brain, they’ve now decided they really don’t have any idea what I can do and they don’t know how to test me. They think they’ve probably got it wrong about the Illusion casting, too.
    Mainly they’re worried I’ll keep tearing holes where they don’t want them, and vanishing.
    Maze asked if there was anything he could do for me, which isn’t the sort of thing you ask someone who’s been locked in a room for days on end with nothing to do except wait for the next medical exam. There’s obviously tons of things they could do, but the question is what they were doing. Poor Maze must have wondered why I looked so angry, but because it was Maze I managed to not shriek and rant.
    “Thing I need is be less homesick,” I said. “Is why that happen, guess. Didn’t go bed think ‘leave tonight’. Not scared, upset. Just homesick. But is different now, plus. Family know where am, make big difference. Plus, would choose not go unless find way not tear hole Earth’s shield, bring monsters. Not acceptable. Is found way stop me leaving?”
    “In truth, we don’t know. You’re still here, but that may be because you haven’t tried to leave. We don’t know if the extra containment on this room is having any effect on you, but it does help some of the more sensitive Setari, who need dampening on their quarters to sleep properly.”
    “Bigger box soon?” I asked, hopefully.
    “Keeping you in high security intensive care indefinitely isn’t very practical.” Maze gave me what I think of as his ‘captain look’. “And stop calling it a box.”
    “Is box long as door lock. What think I do? Go day trip Unara?” My voice had gone flat and hard, and I sighed and shook my head. “Getting tired silly psychology games. Put Cass in box nothing to do. Cass happy do anything, try hard training. Take Cass outside lunch, happy Cass try harder. Cass leave to Earth. Put Cass in smaller box, take away toys.”
    “You think that’s why we took you to lunch?”
    “No.” I was embarrassed about being nasty. “First Squad just nice people. But bet Maze report state Stray’s mental health.”
    His mouth squinched a little, so I knew I was right.
    “First Squad, Setari, they useful weapons. Lots rules. Choose be Setari because protect home. I here, not my planet, but owe life. Since can’t go home yet, willing help. Right thing do. Accept rules. But. Kept in box, annoying. Have interface cut back, stupid. If testing, need reproduce circumstance. Different circumstance nullify test. Someone petty? Or punishment? All achieve is grumpy Cass. Then Maze sent talk me.”
    “Do we seem that manipulative?” He looked really sad.
    I shrugged. “Don’t know sure. Could just be big stupid machine forget Cass person. Or is idea make very obedient? Don’t know. Tolerate it, just annoyed.” And I didn’t want to push them to worse treatment, the possibilities of which I’d had more than enough time to dwell on. I’d had this horrible nightmare where I’d dreamt there was a scar on my stomach, and found out they’d harvested my ovaries and were trying to breed more amplifiers. And since that really was a logical approach, I’d been freaked out half the day about it, caught between desperately attempting to leave again and telling myself not to over-react. Which was probably why I said any of this stuff to Maze. “Sorry. Not Maze’s fault. What happen big tower?”
    I think I’d really depressed him, but he brightened up at the change of subject.
    “That was truly spectacular luck. The Ionoth are symptoms, while the Pillars are the disease. Ever since we’ve been able to travel among the spaces we’ve been searching for them, and that’s intensified a great deal over the past five years with specialist Setari squads. Only twice before have we managed to get anywhere near one, and both times the shifting of the gates meant we barely viewed them before they were cut off. To capture information on a Ddura and a Pillar both is the most progress we’ve ever made. We’re