Trusted Bond

would
    never be any contact. It was forever.
    ―This is your final word.‖
    ―It is.‖
    ―Then this is maat ,‖ the priest said as he turned to look at Archer,
    my father, and Crane‘s father. ―You have the semel-re‘s leave to go, but
    before you do, I will make my announcement to all of you.‖
    I gestured for Crane to come to me.
    He crossed to me fast, and I grabbed his arm. ―One moment please,
    your grace.‖
    ―Of course, my reah.‖
    My eyes flicked to my father, because I knew if it had been anyone
    but the priest, he would have said something about me being his reah. To
    my father, I was filth and nothing more. As predicted, I saw the seething
    rage on his face. He was furious for being called before the priest for what
    he felt was justifiable treatment of me. He wanted me dead. The dark-blue
    eyes that had once warmed when he looked at me were cold and hard.
    Crane‘s father, an older version of him, same hair, same eyes, just
    weathered with streaks of gray, had the same icy resolve on his carved
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    251

    features. Neither my father nor my best friend‘s wanted me anything but
    dead.
    I walked Crane a few feet away and then turned and pulled him in
    close to me.
    ―What?‖
    ―That‘s your father standing there,‖ I said under my breath. ―If you
    want to talk to him or see him or your fam—‖
    He cut me off with a sharp whisper. ―You‘re my family, you stupid
    son of a bitch. How many times do I gotta fuckin‘ say that to you?‖
    He was furious, and I could hear it in his barely controlled voice, see
    it in his eyes. He was so close to me I could feel his breath on my face.
    ―Crane—‖
    ―No,‖ he said, cutting me off, ready to walk away.
    I stopped him from moving, my hand on his bicep. ―Listen, it‘s—‖
    ―Shut up,‖ he ordered, so I did. ―I—you were on the ground.‖
    I stared into his eyes, saw that they had filled, watched him squint to
    keep the tears from falling, felt the muscles in his jaw clench when I put
    my hand on his cheek to settle him.
    ―He… my father, he… he broke your arm with the bat. Do you
    remember?‖
    I nodded fast.
    His breath caught. ―I can‘t… it hurts to see him,‖ he told me, and his
    bottom lip quivered as he swallowed hard. ―Your father—I watched what
    he did, and I never expected it, and it was horrible, but he was still your
    father, and so I was surprised, but it didn‘t change everything for me, it
    didn‘t end who I was. But watching my own father, seeing him do what he
    did… he was mine, ya know? He was the one I loved, the one who loved
    me.‖
    My hand slid from his cheek down to his heart.
    ―He hit you over and over. I mean, after he broke your arm, he kept
    hitting you until my screaming pissed him off.‖
    ―Shit.‖
    ―You don‘t know, ‘cause you were out, but he beat me. Not like you,
    but hard… called me things, said there was only one reason a man chose
    someone else over his family… only one.‖
    252

    Mary Calmes

    The reason seemed obvious, but it wasn‘t. Crane and I had never
    been lovers, only ever friends, though the word didn‘t seem to be enough.
    More like brothers, the only one I still had.
    ―And so?‖
    ―So I chose, and we both know why.‖
    I knew, I always knew.
    ―So just—don‘t think for me, okay?‖ he growled, hand in my hair,
    yanking my head back, manhandling me like he never did. ―I‘m good with
    how things are.‖
    ―Okay,‖ I said, easing free, leaning forward and wrapping my arms
    around his neck, molding my body to his.
    ―Jin,‖ he croaked out, not hugging me back. ―You have to believe
    me.‖
    ―You better fuckin‘ hug me, you shit.‖ I laughed into the side of his
    neck, unhinged suddenly, sounding strange, manic.
    He grabbed me, clutching me tight, and I felt the tremor that ran
    through him. ―Jin. Say it. Say you believe me; tell me you‘ll let it go.‖
    ―But––‖
    ―Jin!‖
    ―All right,‖ I promised him. ―If you‘re really okay with how things
    are, then I‘ll be okay with them for you and not try and fix shit that ain‘t
    broken.‖
    He nodded before he took a step back out of my arms. ―That‘d be a
    nice change.‖
    I flipped him off and he arched a wicked eyebrow for me.
    We rejoined Logan, and he eyed us both. ―Are you two all right?‖
    ―Yep.‖ Crane grinned at him.
    ―Aces.‖ I gave him the thumbs-up.
    His smile made his eyes glow gold fire. It was breathtaking before he
    turned to