Unravel Me: The Juliette Chronicles Book 2

know about what’s already happening to us and what will eventually happen to us. Just looking at him, being so close and being so far away from him—it’s painful.
    I want so desperately to bridge the gap between our bodies. I want to press my lips to every part of him and I want to savor the scent of his skin, the strength in his limbs, in his heart. I want to wrap myself in the warmth and reassurance I’ve come to rely on.
    But.
    In other ways, I’ve come to realize that being away from him has forced me to rely on myself. To allow myself to be scared and to find my own way through it. I’ve had to train without him, fight without him, face Warner and Anderson and the chaos of my mind all without him by my side. And I feel different now. I feel stronger since putting space between us.
    And I don’t know what that means.
    All I know is that it’ll never be safe for me to rely on someone else again, to need constant reassurance of who I am and who I might someday be. I can love him, but I can’t depend on him to be my backbone. I can’t be my own person if I constantly require someone else to hold me together.
    My mind is a mess. Every single day I’m confused, uncertain, worried I’m going to make a new mistake, worried I’m going to lose control, worried I’m going to lose myself. But it’s something I have to work through. Because for the rest of my life, I’ll always, always be stronger than everyone around me.
    But at least I’ll never have to be scared anymore.
    “Are you going to be okay?” Adam asks, finally dispelling the silence between us. I look up to find that his eyes are worried, trying to read me.
    “Yes,” I tell him. “Yes. I’m going to be fine.” I offer him a tight smile, but it feels wrong to be this close to him without being able to touch him at all.
    Adam nods. Hesitates. Says, “It’s been one hell of a night.”
    “And it’ll be one hell of day tomorrow, too,” I whisper.
    “Yeah,” he says quietly, still looking at me like he’s trying to find something, like he’s searching for an answer to an unspoken question and I wonder if he sees something different in my eyes now. He grins a small grin. Says, “I should probably go,” and nods at James bundled in his arms.
    I nod, not sure what else to do. What to say.
    So much is uncertain.
    “We’ll get through this,” Adam says, answering my silent thoughts. “All of it. We’re going to be okay. And Kenji will be fine.” He touches my shoulder, allows his fingers to trail down my arm and stop just short of my bare hand.
    I close my eyes, try to savor the moment.
    And then his fingers graze my skin and my eyes fly open, my heart racing in my chest.
    He’s staring at me like he might’ve done much more than touch my hand if he weren’t holding James against his chest.
    “Adam—”
    “I’m going to find a way,” he says to me. “I’m going to find a way to make this work. I promise. I just need some time.”
    I’m afraid to speak. Afraid of what I might say, what I might do; afraid of the hope ballooning inside of me.
    “Good night,” he whispers.
    “Good night,” I say.
    I’m beginning to think of hope as a dangerous, terrifying thing.

SIXTY-TWO
    I’m so tired when I walk into my room that I’m only half conscious as I change into the tank top and pajama pants I sleep in. They were a gift from Sara. It was her recommendation that I change out of my suit while I sleep; she and Sonya think it’s important to give my skin direct contact with fresh air.
    I’m about to climb under the covers when I hear a soft knock at my door.
    Adam
    is my first thought.
    But then I open the door. And promptly close it.
    I must be dreaming.
    “Juliette?”
    Oh. God.
    “What are you doing here?” I shout-whisper through the closed door.
    “I need to speak with you.”
    “Right now. You need to speak with me right now.”
    “Yes. It’s important,” Warner says. “I heard Kent telling you that those twin girls would be in the medical wing tonight and I figured it would be a good time for us to speak privately.”
    “You heard my conversation with Adam?” I begin to panic, worried he might’ve heard too much.
    “I have zero interest in your conversation with Kent,” he says, his tone suddenly flat, neutral. “I left just as soon as I heard you’d be alone tonight.”
    “Oh.” I exhale. “How did you even get in here without guards stopping you?”
    “Maybe you should open the door so I can