Walking Disaster

I said.
    “I bet you are,” Trenton teased.
    “Lucky bastard,” Tyler grumbled.
    “Hey. We’re not going to talk about your sister like that,” Dad warned.
    Ignoring my brothers, I jogged up the stairs, catching the bedroom door just before it closed. Realizing she might want to get dressed, and wouldn’t be comfortable doing it in front of me
anymore, I froze. “Did you want me to wait in the hall while you dressed for bed?”
    “I’m going to hop in the shower. I’ll just get dressed in the bathroom.”
    I rubbed the back of my neck. “All right. I’ll make a pallet, then.”
    Her big eyes were solid steel as she nodded, her wall obviously impenetrable. She picked out a few things from her bag before making her way to the bathroom.
    Digging in the closet for sheets and a blanket, I spread out the linens on the floor beside the bed, thankful we’d at least have some time alone to talk. Abby emerged from the bathroom,
and I dropped a pillow on the floor at the head of the pallet, and then took my turn in the shower.
    I wasted no time, quickly scrubbing the soap all over my body, letting the water rinse away the suds as soon as they lathered. Within ten minutes, I was already dried off and dressed, walking
back into the bedroom.
    Abby lay in bed when I returned, the sheets as high on her chest as she could get them. The pallet wasn’t nearly as inviting as a bed with Abby snuggled up inside. I realized my last night
with her was going to be spent awake, listening to her breathe just inches away, unable to touch her.
    I turned off the light, and situated myself on the floor. “This is our last night together, isn’t it?”
    “I don’t wanna fight, Trav. Just go to sleep.”
    I turned over to face her, propping up my head with my hand. Abby turned over, too, and our eyes met.
    “I love you.”
    She watched me for a moment. “You promised.”
    “I promised this wasn’t a stunt to get back together. It wasn’t.” I reached up a hand to touch hers. “But if it meant being with you again, I can’t say I
wouldn’t consider it.”
    “I care about you. I don’t want you to hurt, but I should have followed my gut in the first place. It would’ve never worked.”
    “You did love me, though, right?”
    She pressed her lips together. “I still do.”
    Every emotion washed over me in waves, so strong that I couldn’t tell one from the other. “Can I ask you for a favor?”
    “I’m sort of in the middle of the last thing you asked me to do,” she said with a smirk.
    “If this is really it . . . if you’re really done with me . . . will you let me hold you tonight?”
    “I don’t think it’s a good idea, Trav.”
    My hand gripped tight over hers. “Please? I can’t sleep knowing you’re just a foot away, and I’m never gonna get the chance again.”
    Abby stared at me for a few seconds, and then frowned. “I’m not having sex with you.”
    “That’s not what I’m asking.”
    Abby’s eyes darted around the floor for a bit as she contemplated her answer. Finally shutting her eyes tight, she scooted from the edge of the bed, and turned down the covers.
    I crawled into the bed beside her, hastily pulling her tight into my arms. It felt so incredible that coupled with the tension in the room, I struggled not to break down.
    “I’m going to miss this,” I said.
    I kissed her hair and pulled her closer, burying my face into her neck. She rested her hand on my back, and I sucked in another breath, trying to breathe her in, to let that moment of time burn
into my brain.
    “I . . . I don’t think I can do this, Travis,” she said, trying to wriggle free.
    I didn’t mean to restrain her, but if holding on meant avoiding that deep burning pain I’d felt for days on end, it just made sense to hang on.
    “I can’t do this,” she said again.
    I knew what she meant. Being together like that was heartbreaking, but I didn’t want it to end.
    “Then don’t,” I said against her skin. “Give me another chance.”
    After one last attempt to break free, Abby covered her face with both hands and cried in my arms. I looked up at her, tears burning my eyes.
    I pulled one hand gently away and kissed her palm. Abby took a staggered breath as I looked at her lips, and then back to her eyes. “I’ll never love anyone the way I love you,
Pigeon.”
    She sniffed and touched my face, offering an apologetic expression. “I can’t.”
    “I know,” I said, my voice breaking. “I never