Always Remember

I stopped Jen from kissing me. I stopped her . “Shit.”
    Dad looks at me questioningly.
    “I may have kissed her, or rather, she kissed me, and I stopped it. Oh, man. She probably thinks I don’t give a shit!”
    He looks back down and flicks through the file. Of course. I ’m finally coming to him for female advice, and he’s set on work. Typical.
    “ Take the evening off, you’ve done well today, Sam. Arthur and I can sort the last properties. Go and sort what you need to.”
    “ For real?”
    “ For real,” Dad smiles. “Just for God sake, don’t bring your sorry butt back in here until you’ve got Jen on your arm.”
    I double-take. “How did you… Y’know what? Never mind.”
    Dad laughs loudly. I wink, salute him, and tear out of that office like my ass is on fire.

JEN

    He thinks I ’m still with Carl.
    No-one has told him otherwise, and I don ’t think he cares enough except to get into my little lacy panties. The ones with the bows.
    I don ’t know what to think of it. Does it mean he respects me enough to not sleep with me when I’m in a relationship? Or is it respect for Carl?
    Either way, I spent all night thinking it over, and came to the conclusion that Bing just wants in my pants. It ’s okay, because I want in his too. Regardless of his old reputation.
    Apparently old reputation. Do I believe it? Eh. About as much as I ’d believe a pregnant woman telling me she’s a virgin. Bing doesn’t do celibate and apart from a four month relationship last year, he doesn’t do them either.
    Not that he necessarily does fidelity. He ’s about as faithful as a rabbit in mating season bonking their way round the rabbit hole.
    So. .. Sex is good. The best way to get over someone is to get under them, right? Maybe I just need to man up... Yikes. I don’t want a penis . Ahem . Maybe I just need to woman up, and woman handle him into my bedroom.
    Yes. We can go for that. We ’ll get together, leave emotion at the door, and have a good old spring bounce on the bed. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.

    ~

BING

    People are exes for a reason, and when I look into the pleading puppy dog eyes of my ex, Heidi, I wonder why the fuck she was ever in the position to become an ex in the first place.
    “No.” I say flatly. “I have a place to be.”
    “ Bing, please, we were so good together.” She tries to trail a finger down my arm and my skin crawls at the thought.
    “ Still no.” I move away from her. “Bye, Heidi.”
    “ Bing! I forgive you, you know. I don’t care if you cheated.”
    Jesus Christ, is she fucking stupid?
    “Heidi, listen. I didn’t give a shit six months ago, I don’t give a shit today, and I probably won’t tomorrow either. Do yourself a favour and stop making a fool of yourself.” I leave without looking, and ask myself why I have.
    That there, my friends, was sex on a plate. With a fucking birthday candle and sprinkles.
    It was also as ugly as hell. What have I been doing my whole life?
    ‘ Maybe you should find a nice girl to settle down with ,’ Grammy said before she died. Good logic, not enough execution.
    Here ’s the thing; the girls I sleep with are nice enough, they give me what I want, and most of them leave without a fuss. I’m mildly, if not highly attracted to them. Sometimes, if I like them enough, I’ll have another go.
    I liked Heidi enough to stick around for three months, and become ‘exclusive’ before my dick developed its own brain, and ran after the next girl with a half decent pair of tits. I ended the ‘relationship’ not long after. I might be a prick but I’m not a serial cheater and I won’t lie about it.
    But still - Heidi offered me sex the way you ’d offer your Gran a cup of tea. I still said no. I wouldn’t even consider it. My brain can’t consider it.
    I pull up outside my house and decide to call my sister. Unlocking the door, I wrestle my phone from my pocket and speed dial her.
    “ Something serious must be wrong if you’re calling me willingly,” Lexy muses as soon as she answers.
    “ I just got accosted by my ex-girlfriend,” I grumble. “That’s pretty serious.”
    “ Oh no,” she says in a flat voice. “However did you cope having a busty babe rubbing her plastic chest against you?”
    “ No need to be a bitch. It was hell. I think I’m scarred for life.”
    “ I’m sure you’ll live.”
    I grunt and rub my face. “I have a question.”
    “ Go on...” she says suspiciously. My sister, always the