Brother Cadfael 07: The Sanctuary Sparrow

her chin. Already the contortion was beginning to ease out of her features, and leave her at peace.
    Neither of the two who watched beside her had spoken a word since their work was finished. Susanna had made no bones about dismissing Margery's reluctant offer of help, and had no difficulty in getting rid of all three of her kin. They were not sorry to return to their beds and leave all to her. Mistress and maid had the vigil to themselves.
    'You're cold,' said Rannilt, breaking the silence very softly as she saw Susanna shiver. 'Shall I fetch up your cloak? You felt the want of it even about the store, when you were on the move, and now we sit here, and the night chillier than then. I'll creep down for it.'
    'No,' said Susanna absently. 'It was a goose walking over my grave. I'm warm enough.' She turned her head and gave the girl a long, sombre stare. 'Were you so vexed for me that you must wake and watch into the night with me? I thought you came very quickly. Did you see and hear all?'
    Rannilt trembled at the thought of having intruded uninvited, but Susanna's voice was equable and her face calm. 'No. I wasn't listening, but some part I couldn't help hearing. She praised your providing. Perhaps she was sorry then ... It was strange she should take to thinking on such things, and suddenly take pride that you should still have the oatmeal crock above half-full ... That I heard. Surely she was sorry in the end that you should be so misprised. She thought better of you than of any other.'
    'She was returning to the days when she ruled all,' said Susanna, 'and had all on her shoulders, as I have had. The old go back, before the end.' Her eyes, large and intent upon Rannilt's face, gleamed in the dim, reflected light from the lamp. 'You've burned your hand,' she said. 'I'm sorry.'
    'It's nothing,' said Rannilt, removing her hands hurriedly from sight into her lap. 'I was clumsy. The tow flared. It doesn't hurt.'
    'The tow ...?'
    'Tied round the bundle that was lying there. It had a frayed end and took the flame before I was aware.'
    'A pity!' said Susanna, and sat silent for some moments, watching her grandmother's dead face. The corners of her lips curved briefly in what hardly had time to become a smile. 'There was a bundle there, was there? And I was wearing my cloak ... yes! You noticed much, considering the fright we must have given you, between us.'
    In the prolonged silence Rannilt watched her lady's face and went in great awe, having trodden where she had no right to go, and feeling herself detected in a trespass she had never intended.
    'And now you are wondering what was in that bundle, and where it vanished to before ever we began lighting candles. Along with my cloak!' Susanna fixed her austere, half-smiling regard upon Rannilt's daunted face. 'It is only natural you should wonder.'
    'Are you angry with me?' ventured Rannilt in a whisper.
    'No. Why should I be angry? I believe, I do believe, you have sometimes felt for me as a woman for a woman. Is that true, Rannilt?'
    'This morning ...' faltered Rannilt, half-afraid, 'I could not choose but grieve ...'
    'I know. You have seen how I am despised here.' She went very gently and quietly, a woman speaking with a child, but a child whose understanding she valued. 'How I have always been despised. My mother died, my grandmother grew old, I was of value until my brother should take a wife. Yes, but barely a day longer. All those years gone for nothing, and I am left here husbandless and barren and out of office.'
    There was another silence, for though Rannilt felt her breast bursting with indignant sympathy, her tongue was frozen into silence. In the lofty darkness of the roof-beams the faint, soft light quivered in a passing draught.
    'Rannilt,' said Susanna gravely and softly, 'can you keep a secret?'
    'Your secret I surely can,' whispered Rannilt.
    'Swear never to breathe a word to any other, and I'll tell you what no one else knows.'
    Rannilt breathed her vow devotedly, flattered and warmed at having such trust placed in her.
    'And will you help me in what I mean to undertake? For I should welcome your help ... I need your help!'
    "I'll do anything in my power for you.' No one had ever expected or required of her such loyalty, no one had ever considered her as better than menial and impotent, no wonder her heart responded.
    'I believe and trust you.' Susanna leaned forward into the light. 'My bundle and my cloak I made away out of sight before I brought the