Carnal Innocence

all due modesty, he’d be the first one to admit he was damn good.
    Still, it irked him that his weekend had been ruined. It upset his sense of order that the Bureau’s pathologist assigned to the case had been delayed by thunderstorms in Atlanta. He didn’t trust some backwater coroner to perform a decent autopsy.
    His irritation grew as he drove through town in the nearly airless car. It was just as he’d suspected—a few sweaty pedestrians, a couple of loose dogs, a huddle of dusty storefronts. There wasn’t even a movie theater. He gave a little shudder at the faded hand-printed letters that spelled out CHAT ’N Chew on the only restaurant in sight. Thank God he’d packed his own Krups coffee-maker.
    A job was a job, he reminded himself as he pulled up in front of the sheriff’s office. There were times one had to suffer in the pursuit of justice. Taking only his briefcase, and trying not to strangle in the heat, he meticulously locked his car.
    When Jed Larsson’s dog, Nuisance, wandered up to lift his leg on the front tire, Burns merely shook his head. He didn’t doubt he’d find the manners of the two-legged residents equally crude.
    “Nice car,” Claude Bonny said from his perch in front of the rooming house. And spat.
    Burns lifted one dark brow. “It serves.”
    “You selling something, son?”
    “No.”
    Bonny exchanged looks with Charlie O’Hara and Pete Koons. O’Hara wheezed out a couple of breaths and squinted. “You’d be that FBI man from up north, then.”
    “Yes.” Burns felt sweat slide down his back and prayed the town ran to an adequate dry cleaner.
    “I used to watch that show with Efrem Zimbalist on it every week.” Koons took a pull on his lemonade. “Damn good show, that one.”
    “Dragnet
was better,” Bonny stated. “Can’t understand why they took it off the air. Don’t make shows like that no more.”
    “If you’ll excuse me,” Burns said.
    “Go on in, son.” Bonny waved him on. “Sheriff’s inside. Been there all morning. You catch that psycho that’s killing our girls, and we’ll string ’em up for you.”
    “Really, I don’t—”
    “Didn’t that guy from
Dragnet
go on over to be a doctor on that
M*A*S*H
show?” O’Hara wondered. “Seems I recollect that.”
    “Jack Webb never played no doctor,” Bonny said, taking it as a personal affront.
    “No, t’other one. Little guy. My missus near to bust a gut watching that show.”
    “Good Lord,” Burns said under his breath, and pushed open the door of the sheriff’s office.
    Burke was at his desk, the phone cupped between his chin and shoulder while he busily scrawled on a legal pad. “Yes, sir, the minute he gets here. I …” He looked up and identified Burns as quickly as he’d have separated a quail from a pheasant. “Hold on. You Special Agent Burns?”
    “That’s right.” Following procedure, Burns pulled out his I.D. and flashed it.
    “He just walked in,” Burke said into the phone, then held it out. “It’s your boss.”
    Burns set his briefcase aside and took the receiver. “Chief Hadley? Yes, sir, my e.t.a. was a bit off. There was a problem with the car in Greenville. Yes, sir. Dr. Rubenstein should be here by three. I’ll be sure to do that. Just off the top, I’d say we’ll need another phone, this appears to be a single line. And …” He placed a hand over the mouthpiece. “Do you have a fax machine?”
    Burke ran his tongue around his teeth. “No, sir, I don’t.”
    “And a fax machine,” Burns continued into the receiver. “I’ll call in as soon as I’ve done the preliminary and settled in. Yes, sir.” He handed the phone back to Burke and checked the seat of the swivel chair before sitting. “Now then, you’d be Sheriff …”
    “Truesdale, Burke Truesdale.” The handshake was brief and formal. Burke caught a whiff of baby powder. “We’ve got a mess here, Agent Burns.”
    “So I’m informed. Three mutilations in four and a half months. No suspects.”
    “None.” Burke barely caught himself before apologizing. “We figured a drifter, but with the last one … Then there’s that one up in Nashville.”
    Burns steepled his hands. “You have files, I presume.”
    “Yeah.” Burke started to rise.
    “Not quite yet. You can fill me in orally as we go. I’ll want to see the body.”
    “We have her down at the funeral parlor.”
    “Most appropriate,” Burns said dryly. “We’ll take a look, then go to the crime scene. You’ve