Coyote blue

angry. "Put that stuff back."
    Lloyd lifted Adeline's sunglasses and looked her in the eye. "Mrs. Eats, you say you have a house full of sick kids. What exactly have you done to make them better?"
    "I took them to the clinic but we couldn't get in. I've been praying."
    Lloyd nodded knowingly. "Well you can say good-bye to prayer." He stormed back into the living room, picked up the Bible, and threw it in the garbage bag. "You don't need prayer when you have a medicine that reduces swelling, increases sex drive, and directly addresses the national debt."
    "No," Adeline said, following him. "I don't want any."
    He went to the crucifix on the wall, tore it off, and threw it in the bag. "Quiets coughs, promotes regularity, increases energy…"
    "No!" Adeline said.
    Lloyd took the 3-D picture of Jesus off the television and threw it in the bag.
    "Calms nerves."
    "No!"
    "Cures acne."
    "No!"
    "Cures crabs, spiritual indecision, poison sumac, rabies, and -"
    "No!"
    "Gets rid of unwanted owls."
    "How much is it?" Adeline said.
    "Cash or check?" Lloyd said. He sat back down on the couch.
    Adeline heard the bedroom door open. She turned and saw Milo coming into the living room, wearing sunglasses. He couldn't tolerate bright light for a day or two after a peyote ceremony. "What in the hell is going on out here?"
    "I was just talking to this salesman," Adeline said.
    "What salesman?"
    Adeline turned around. The salesman, his sample case, and the garbage bag full of over-the-counter icons were gone. The brown bottle of Miracle Medicine sat on the table.
    "Here honey, take some of this," she said. "You'll feel better."
    She felt better already.
    ~* * *~
    Sam felt as if he were passing out, then the vertigo of falling. The sounds around him faded; Pokey's voice became distant, then silent. He felt his stomach lurch, as if he had just gone into the big drop of a roller coaster, then an impact that flattened him on the ground. He looked up, expecting to see the others around him in the sweat lodge. The lodge, and everyone in it, was gone. There was nothing but blackness and the sound of his own breathing.
    A thousand questions raced through his brain, but he realized that each one led to another and the best strategy was to maintain a state of automatic action and remember why he was here. He stood and squinted into the darkness. Two golden eyes were floating in front of him. He heard the sound of an animal breathing.
    Suddenly a stone platform started to glow. On it stood a figure: a man's body with a dog's head, wearing an Egyptian kilt. Except for the golden eyes, he was black, so black he appeared to absorb light. He carried a golden staff tipped with the effigy of a falcon. Beside him on the platform was the source of the breathing sounds: a beast the size of a hippo, with the jaws of a crocodile on the body of a lion. It snorted and snapped at the air, flicking foam from its jaws. Behind them both stood a giant balance scale.
    Despite all he had been through, Sam felt a wave of mind-blanking terror pass through him. He wanted to run, but couldn't move. With the light coming off the pedestal he could see human bones scattered around him. He realized that he was standing on his toes, every muscle in his body rigid.
    The black dog man snapped his staff on the platform. "Okay, up on the scale," he said. Then he narrowed his gaze and stepped down from the platform. "Wait a minute, you're alive. Go away. We only do the dead. Out, out, out."
    Of all the strange things Sam had seen in the last week, watching the dog mouth forming human speech was the strangest. It looked like the creature was trying to yak up a chicken bone. Suddenly the fear was gone. This was too goofy, like an Alpo commercial filmed in Hell.
    "Are you the one I'm supposed to talk to about – about getting some help?"
    "Look, I tried to warn you that my brother was going to cause you problems. I sent my agent to help you."
    "Your brother?"
    "Coyote is my brother. He didn't tell you?"
    "No, he never mentioned a brother. He said I had to find the one that weighs the souls."
    The dog man scoffed. "Well there's the scale. And here I am. Take a wild guess. Go ahead, Einstein, figure it out. I can't believe he didn't mention me." He sat down, hung his head and began scratching himself behind the ears. "He's an ingrate."
    The monster growled and Sam jumped back.
    "That's Ammut," the dog man said. "He wants to eat you."
    Sam shuddered. "Maybe later. I'm here to ask a