Death of a Red Heroine

formally.
YU: How was your first meeting?
LAI: Guan sort of surprised me. With arranged introductions, you can hardly expect to meet a pretty young girl. More often than not, those you get introduced to are plain, over thirty, and without education. Guan was only twenty-two and quite attractive. A model worker, and taking college correspondence courses at the time. You know all that, I believe. I have never figured out why she consented to such an arrangement. She could have had a lot of men dancing around her.
YU: What other impressions did you have of her that day?
LAI: A moving awkwardness. Innocent, almost naive. Obviously she was not used to such meetings.
YU: Was it her first date?
LAI: I was not sure about it, but she had no idea how to express herself in my company. She was literally tongue-tied when we were left alone.
YU: Then how did things work out between you?
LAI: Well, we clicked, as some people would say, without talking much to each other. We did not stay long the first time, but we did go to a movie the next week, and then had dinner in Meilong Zheng.
YU: She was still tongue-tied the second time?
LAI: No, we talked a lot, about our families, the lost years in the Cultural Revolution, and the common interests we had. A few days later, I went to one of her presentations at the Youth Palace without her knowledge. She seemed to be a totally different person on the stage.
YU: Interesting. How different?
LAI: Well, she seldom talked about politics in my company. Once or twice, maybe, I tried to bring the topic up, but she seemed unwilling to talk about it. On the stage, she appeared so confident, speaking with genuine conviction. I was glad that she did not talk politics to me, for we soon became lovers.
YU: Lovers—in what sense?
LAI: What do you mean?
YU: Physically?
LAI: Yes.
YU: How soon?
LAI: After four or five weeks.
YU: That was quick.
LAI: It was sooner than I had expected.
YU: Was it you who took the initiative?
LAI: I see what you mean. Do I have to answer questions like that?
YU: I cannot force you, Comrade Lai. But if you do, it may help our investigation. And it may also save me another trip to your boss.
LAI: Well, it was a Friday night, I remember. We went to a dancing party in the western hall of the Shanghai Writers’ Association. It was the first year when social dancing was publicly allowed in Shanghai. A friend of mine had obtained the tickets for us. While we were dancing, I noticed that she was getting excited.
YU: Excited—in which way?
LAI: It was obvious. It was in the summer. Her body was pressed against me. Her breasts—I noticed—you know, I really can’t be more precise.
YU: And you? Were you also excited?
LAI: Yes.
YU: What happened afterwards?
LAI: We went back to my place with a group of friends. We talked and had some drinks.
YU: Did you drink a lot that night?
LAI: No, only a cup of Qingdao beer. In fact, I shared the cup with her. I remember that because later—later we kissed. It was our first time, and she said we smelled of each other—from the same cup.
YU: That sounds really romantic.
LAI: Yes, it was.
YU: And then?
LAI: People were leaving. She could have left with them. It was already twelve thirty, but she stayed on. It was a terrific gesture. She wanted to help me clean up, she declared.
YU: So you must have been terribly pleased with her offer?
LAI: Well, I told her to leave everything alone. It was not a night to worry about dirty dishes and leftovers.
YU: I guess you would say that.
LAI: She would not listen to me. Instead, she started hustling and bustling in the kitchen. She did everything, washing the dishes, sweeping the floor, wrapping up the leftovers, and putting them in a bamboo basket on the balcony. She said that the food wouldn’t go bad that way; I did not have a refrigerator at the time.
YU: Very domestic, very considerate.
LI: Yes, that’s exactly what a wife would choose to do. So I kissed her for the first time.
YU: So you stayed in the kitchen with her all the time?
LAI: Yes, I did, watching in amazement. But after she finished, we moved back into the room
YU: Go on.
LAI: Well, we were alone. She did not show any intention of leaving. So I suggested I take a few pictures of her. I had just got a new camera, a Nikon 300. My brother had bought it for me in Japan.
YU: That’s a fancy one.
LAI: She was reclining on the bed, saying something about the transience of a woman’s beauty. I agreed. She wanted to have some pictures that