Dr Jew

said.
    She hit Swan's shoulder. He barely felt it. Something about the whole situation didn't feel like a threat. More like a joke. Swan got off of Adam and the woman stopped hitting, stopped yelling.
    Swan looked to Ueda, who also seemed at a loss.
    "Are you two all right?" said Ueda.
    "Adam, it 's okay," said Eve. "Oh, I wish we had stayed at the doctor's."
    Adam looked with distrust at Swan, arose and dusted off the mud. "Don't say that, Eve. It will be okay. It was just a mistake."
    "I 'm sorry I hurt you," said Swan.
    "It 's okay," said Adam. "I'm fine."
    "You are not," said Eve. "And we still need clothes. It's cold out here and you guys attacked him for no good reason."
    "We thought he was a crazy homeless person," said Ueda. "Now we see that he's just a homeless person."
    "You 're very pretty," said Swan to Eve, his eyes fixed on her breasts.
    "Stop staring at her!" said Adam. "I bet you want to rape her now. That's how it always goes on the news. Well go ahead and try, but first you'll have to get through me. Over my dead body ."
    "Maybe they are crazy," said Ueda. "Do crazy people talk in cliché? I can never remember."
    "We won't hurt you," said Swan. "But why aren't you wearing clothes?"
    "We escaped from a mad scientist 's laboratory," said Eve.
    "Oh," said Swan.
    "Yeah, so now we're naked and ready to kill for clothes," said Adam. "We're vicious criminals and soon the cops will be on our backs and we don't care. So there!"
    "You don 't have to be criminals," said Swan. "We have extra uniforms at the dojo, don't we, Ueda Sensei?"
    Ueda frowned, but said, "Yes, I suppose we do. But we don't know them well. Don't trust them. They could be drug addicts or have rabies, so watch your back, Swan. I have taught you that much, haven't I?"
    "Yes."
    It was still early and a Sunday morning. It was quiet and no one bothered them as they walked to Ueda's dojo. The cars slowed a little in the fog and Swan thought he saw a man take their picture with his phone, but then the car drove on. Adam expected a net to come down and capture them and he was prepared to claw and bite his way to freedom if he must. No net came.
    Ueda didn 't know what to make of the young couple. The girl was pretty and it might be nice if he didn't have extra uniforms after all. He ushered them into the dojo.
    "I figured out why you 're so pretty," said Swan.
    "What do you mean?" said Eve.
    "It's because you look like my ma."
    "I do?"
    "Yeah. My ma's older though. I think. How old are you?"
    "We don 't know," said Adam. "Stop attacking us with questions."
    "Sorry," said Swan.
    "We have a right to know who you are if we're going to help you," said Ueda.
    "I told you we don 't know," said Adam. "He did something to our heads. We can't remember anything before the lab."
    "He?" said Ueda. "Ah, your mad scientist."
    "Dr. Jew!" said Eve.
    "The worst man in the world," said Adam.
    "Dr... Jew?" said Ueda.
    "Yeah," said Adam. "Friend of yours?"
    "I don 't know the man. It's just an unusual name."
    "Why is he so bad?" said Swan.
    "Hey, I thought we were gonna get clothes," said Eve. "I don't think you guys are supposed to look at me naked."
    The three men looked at her.
    "Hey!" she said.
    Ueda went into an office connected to the gym. He came back with two martial arts uniforms: pants, jacket, and a belt to wrap each jacket. Adam and Eve put on the uniforms and looked cool.
    "Thanks," said Adam. "Now we don't feel so… naked."
    "You look ready to fight," said Ueda.
    "Fight? No, that's the last thing we want. I may look tough –"
    "Not really," said Ueda.
    "Yeah, you're not so tough," said Swan.
    "Well," said Adam, "I may sound tough, but I'm a real swell, gentle guy. Eve and I want normal lives. Is that so much to ask? I can be a dentist and she can be a mother to my children. That would be great."
    "That 's a pipe dream," said Ueda. "Nobody does that anymore, least of all homeless people."
    "Well, then I 'll do something else!" said Adam. "You don't need to shit on my parade. I'll start a website or something. Whatever that is."
    "Why don 't you sue Dr. Jew?" said Swan.
    "For what?" said Eve.
    "For money," said Swan. "People always sue each other. It's cool."
    "Well, o f course we want to be cool," said Adam, "but I don't know if we could be around him long enough to sue him. He's real mean and smells weird."
    "Like what?" said Swan.
    "I don't know," said Adam. "What am I? Some kind of… smell expert?"
    "Swan may be onto something ," said Ueda. "I