Existence 01 - Existence

time they’d lost.
    “Why does she keep threatening everyone with time? Is that like how long you get time out or something?”
    I laughed and shook my head. “No, it’s actually the opposite. We only get one hour a day to stay in our rooms alone. It’s a punishment to get your time deducted. Time alone in your room to escape is coveted.”
    Leif let out a ragged sigh and shook his head. “You don’t belong here, Pagan,” he said, staring back at me with a frown.
    I shrugged. “Just because I don’t throw fits, curse at nurses, and deal with voices in my head doesn’t mean I’m not dealing with my own stuff.” He didn’t nod in agreement. His hand squeezed mine.
    “I love you. I’m not going anywhere,” he said in a hoarse whisper. Tears sprang to my eyes and I gave him a watery smile.
    “I know.” I wanted to say more but I knew I couldn’t.
    “Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou, Romeo,” Gee called from the hallway as she walked toward the stairs with her arms full of towels.
    I laughed out loud. “She’s harmless,” I assured Leif, and then thought about it a moment. “Okay, maybe not harmless.
    But she doesn’t mean any harm right now.” Leif’s look of horror returned.
    “Do you lock your door at night?” he asked, glancing around as if afraid one of them would hear him and come after him.
    I grinned and nodded. “But only because there’s a lot of screaming and running at night. Night terrors and the like.”
    He shook his head and gazed back down at me. “Please, hurry and get better and come home. This is not where you belong.”
    “I know.”
    * * * *
    The muffled screams began right after lights out was announced. I covered my head and blocked out the sound. I had waited all day to return to this bed and fall into a deep sleep where I could hopefully hear his music. I thought of the times he had sung to me and the times he’d held me and kissed me. My eyes drifted closed and the music began. I fought, wanting to open my eyes and find him in my room. He was there. I could feel him. His guitar played my lullaby and I tried desperately to open my eyes. It was as if a dark blanket was over me, and I couldn’t remove. Instead of being panicked, it warmed me. The comfort of knowing Dank was with me would be enough for now. His voice joined the strumming of his guitar. He knew I was here and he’d come to me. I wasn’t alone. The muffled sounds of screams and slamming doors ceased and all I heard was the music that helped fill the hole inside of me. I wanted to turn around and face the source of the music and throw myself into his arms. I drifted off to sleep, unable to fight the drowsiness any longer.
    * * * *
    “Aren’t you just little Miss Popularity?” Gee was sauntering down the hall toward my room when I stepped out into the hall after a thirty minute nap. If it wasn’t for my nights when the music came and Dank was with me, I would lose my mind from the monotony of this place. “I have a visitor?” I asked as Gee turned into her bedroom.
    “Yep,” she said and slammed the door behind her. There was no way Gee had any alone time left today. I’d personally heard Nurse Karen take away two days’ worth since breakfast. Someone would be up searching for her in a few minutes.
    I headed down the steps, anxious to see who’d come to see me. The moment my eyes found Miranda standing at the front door with her arms crossed over her chest defensively I broke into a run.
    “Did Gee come tell you that you had a visitor?” Nurse Karen asked, frowning and glancing behind me. I nodded, not wanting to be the one to rat Gee out for going to her room. “Where is she?” Nurse Karen asked.
    I raised my eyebrows and shrugged. “I thought she came back down here.” Nurse Karen stared down the hallway, frowning as if she thought she had missed Gee’s return. She nodded and went back to typing on the computer.
    Miranda threw her arms around me as soon as I reached her. It felt so good to see her. “Please leave with me,” she whispered in my ear.
    I chuckled. “I can’t.”
    “I’ll help you break out. Girl, these people are crazy, you need to get out.” I bit back a laugh. “The Gee girl is a nut case and she did not come back down those stairs. I was watching her. If she didn’t come back down with you promptly I was coming up to avenge you.” I laughed out loud this time.
    “Come on over here and we can talk.” I took her hand and led her back to where I had sat