Faster We Burn

his.

 
     
    Chapter Thirty-two
     
     
    Stryker
     
    I’d been nervous for Thanksgiving with Katie’s family, but that was nothing to how I felt about Christmas.
    “Should I bring a tie? Do you think I should bring a tie?” I said to Katie as I packed a bag. I was only planning on staying for a week or so, to feel things out, even though our winter break was nearly a month long. I didn’t want to overstay my welcome.
    “You are being way too neurotic,” Katie said, leaning on my suitcase so I couldn’t put anything more in it. “No one is going to care if you wear a tie, although, I like that black thin one you have in your closet.”
    I went and grabbed the only black skinny tie I owned.
    “This one?”
    “That’s the one.” She took it from me, folded it and placed it in the suitcase. “I think you need to be done now.” She zipped it shut and lay on top of it so I couldn’t access it, even if I wanted to.
    “Why are you so nervous? You’ve been to my house a bunch of times. You’ve seen us at our worst and still came out alive.”
    “That was…different. I was there because I had a place to fill. You were so sad and I wanted to be there for you. But you don’t need me like that anymore. You’re strong enough.”
    I shrugged.
    Katie got up from our bed and stood in front of me, a little smile on her face.
    “You’re an idiot. You’re. An. Idiot.” I’d said the exact same thing to her once. “I do need you. I need you because sometimes I feel like you’re the one thing that holds me together. I start thinking about all the bad things in my life and then I think of you, and all the bad things don’t seem so bad anymore.”
    I put my arms around her.
    “But the real question is, should I bring another tie?”
     
    ***
     
    This time, Katie drove, and we didn’t need a GPS. I also had her hand in mine. She had to take it slow as a few snowflakes drifted down and melted as quick as they hit the pavement.
    “You think we’re going to get a white Christmas?” she said, dropping her speed down as the snow got heavier. Pretty soon it would start to stick. I just hoped we got there before that happened. I didn’t exactly trust the Mazda’s ability to navigate a snowy road.
    “That would be nice. Haven’t had one of those in a long time,” I said, peering up at the grey sky.
    “When I was a kid and it snowed, Dad used to take this thing and make reindeer footprints on the lawn. That was how I discovered that Santa wasn’t real. I caught him doing them one night. He was so upset that year.”
    I loved hearing about her Christmas memories. They beat the hell out of mine.
    “I guess there won’t be anyone to do it now.”
    “Why can’t you do it?”
    “I don’t know. I guess I could.”
    “Make you a deal. If it snows, we’ll go out and do it together.” I squeezed her hand and she squeezed back.
    “Deal.”
     
    ***
     
    The other thing that gave me pause was Katie’s Christmas present. I had two, actually. One to give her in front of her family and one that I’d give her in private. I’d made both of them, and I was beyond nervous that she’d like them. One could be construed as semi-creepy, and that was the one I was going to give her when we were alone.
    I had no idea what she had planned for me, but I knew she was up to something, because I’d caught her whispering on the phone when she thought I was doing something else. I didn’t really care if she gave me anything. Having her safe and in my arms was enough.
    “Well hello again,” Kayla said, opening the door and giving Katie a huge hug. As soon as they let go, Kayla grabbed me and gave me one too. Well that was unexpected.
    “Hey, man,” Adam said, giving me a handshake.
    “Oh my God,” Katie said, staring at Kayla.
    “What?” she said, giving Adam a nervous look that he shared. I looked at Kayla, but didn’t get it.
    “You’re pregnant,” Katie said, removing her hand from her mouth. “You are freaking pregnant!”
    “Keep your voice down,” Kayla said, grabbing Katie’s arm and yanking us back out on the porch. I had no choice but to follow, and Adam closed the door behind us.
    “I haven’t told mom yet, you moron. Besides, we just found out. How did you even know?”
    “Look at you.” She looked exactly the same to me. I even let my eyes travel to her stomach, but it looked just as flat as ever. “I can totally see it.”
    “Where?” Kayla flattened her shirt over her