Feet of Clay

Hopkinson’s sister that I’d tidy it up. You know, get it sorted out. She’s not very well off and I thought it could raise some money. Just between you and me, there’s several exhibits in there that could be better-presented, but I’m afraid Mr. Hopkinson was rather set in his ways. I’m sure there’s a lot of dwarfs in the city that’d flock there if they knew about it, and of course there’s a lot of youngsters that ought to learn more about their proud heritage. A good dusting and a lick of paint would make all the difference, I’m sure, especially on the older loaves. I don’t mind giving up a few days off. I just thought it might cheer you up, but I appreciate that bread isn’t everyone’s cup of tea.”
    Angua stared at him. It was the stare that Carrot so often attracted. It roamed every feature of his face, looking for the tiniest clue that he was making some kind of joke. Some long, deep joke at the expense of everyone else. Every sinew in her body knew that he must be, but there was not a clue, not a twitch to prove it.
    “Yes,” she said weakly, still searching his face, “I expect it could be a little goldmine.”
    “Museums have got to be a whole lot more interesting these days. And, you know, there’s a whole guerrilla crumpet assortment he hasn’t even catalogued,” said Carrot. “ And some early examples of defensive bagels.”
    “Gosh,” said Angua. “Hey, why don’t we paint a big sign saying something like ‘The Dwarf Bread Experience’?”
    “That probably wouldn’t work for dwarfs,” said Carrot, oblivious to sarcasm. “A dwarf bread experience tends to be short. But I can see it’s certainly caught your imagination!”
    I’ll have to go , Angua thought as they strolled on down the street. Sooner or later he’ll see that it can’t really work out. Werewolves and humans…we’ve both got too much to lose. Sooner or later I’ll have to leave him .
    But, for one day at a time, let it be tomorrow.
    “Want the dresses back?” said Cheri, behind her.
    “Maybe one or two,” said Angua.

About the Author
    Terry Pratchett’s novels have sold more than thirty million (give or take a few million) copies worldwide. He lives in England.
    www.terrypratchettbooks.com
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Praise for TERRY PRATCHETT’s
DISCWORLD
    “Smart and funny.”
    Denver Post
    “Humorously entertaining (and subtly thought-provoking) fantasy…Pratchett’s Discworld books are filled with humor and with magic, but they’re rooted in, of all things, real life and cold, hard reason.”
    Contra Costa Times
    “Pratchett has created an alternate universe full of trolls, dwarfs, wizards, and other fantasy elements, and he uses that universe to reflect on our own culture with entertaining and gloriously funny results. It’s an accomplishment nothing short of magical.”
    Chicago Tribune
    “Terry Pratchett seems constitutionally unable to write a page without at least a twitch of the grin muscles….[But] the notions Pratchett plays with are nae so narrow or nae so silly as your ordinary British farce. Seriously.”
    San Diego Union-Tribune
    “Discworld takes the classic fantasy universe through its logical, and comic, evolution.”
    Cleveland Plain Dealer
    “Terry Pratchett may still be pegged as a comic novelist but…he’s a lot more. In his range of invented characters, his adroit storytelling, and his clear-eyed acceptance of humankind’s foibles, he reminds me of no one in English literature as much as Geoffrey Chaucer. No kidding.”
    Washington Post Book World
    “What makes Terry Pratchett’s fantasies so entertaining is that their humor depends on the characters first, on the plot second, rather than the other way around. The story isn’t there simply to lead from one slapstick pratfall to another pun. Its humor is genuine and unforced.”
    Ottawa Citizen
    “Pratchett, for those not yet lucky enough to have discovered him, is one of England’s most highly regarded satirists. Nothing—not religion, not politics, not anything—is safe from him.”
    South Bend Tribune
    “He is head and shoulders above the best of the rest. He is screamingly funny. He is wise. He has style.”
    Daily Telegraph (London)
    “Think J.R.R. Tolkien with a sharper, more satiric edge.”
    Houston Chronicle
    “The Discworld novels are a phenomenon.”
    Fort Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel
    “Consistently, inventively