Grime and Punishment

baseball game of the season.
    “You don’t need to stay, Mom,“ he offered. “I always stay. Aren’t you pitching?“
    “Only the first inning. The coach said since we don’t have any chance of the championship, he’s gonna let everybody pitch.“
    “Well, I’ll probably stay anyway.“
    “You don’t need to,“ he insisted.
    The problem was suddenly clear. They were having a big picnic after the game, and Todd didn’t want his freedom to enjoy himself hampered by her presence. Since it was already arranged that another mother would bring the car pool home, he’d counted on attending as a “bachelor,“ so to speak.
    “Okay, I’ll just watch your inning.”
    He smiled. “Thanks, Mom-Old-Thing.”
    When they reached the field, he and the three boys they’d picked up fled and Jane hung back, checking out who was there. There were mothers one never got near at these games, women who made George Steinbrenner look like Heidi. Happily, she spotted Suzie Williams and picked her way up the bleachers to join her.
    Suzie was one of her favorite people. She was a big divorcée who would have been called “handsome“ in an earlier age. She had long, platinum-blond hair and a gorgeous complexion. Her cheeks were always naturally pink, and her eyes were glacial-blue. She looked like an earthy Swedish queen who’d been hitting the smorgasbord a little too heavily.
    She saw Jane coming and put down the blood-and-guts paperback novel she’d been reading. “Good God, it’s Jane Jeffry, font of murderous gossip. I imagine you’re being driven mad by nosy neighbors callously invading your privacy and peace of mind? Most people are so insensitive.“
    “What do you want to know?“
    “Everything! Every bloody detail!”
    Jane gave her account by rote. She’d told it so many times it hardly seemed real anymore. The one thing she didn’t mention was the missing pearls. That was, unfortunately, Shelley’s secret, and Jane felt bound to honor it, even if she disapproved.
    “Shelley might have talked to the police again by now and found out something more, but she wasn’t home when I came out. She and Paul are staying at a hotel.“
    “Hiding from the killer?“
    “No, I think they’re having an orgy.“
    “If I could get my hands on Paul Nowack, I’d have an orgy too. Ever seen him in swimming trunks? Oh, to die for—! Anyhow, who do you think killed her?“
    “I haven’t any idea.“
    “Too bad it wasn’t the regular one that got knocked off. Edith, isn’t that her name?“
    “Why? What’s the matter with Edith?“
    “I don’t know. I just didn’t like her. I just had her once, and by the end of a day having her mooch around looking like she had a cob up her ass, I wanted to bang my head on the wall—or hers. Depressing bitch. Kept giving me these searching looks, like she was waiting for me to say something to take offense at. I probably obliged. I generally do.“
    “That’s weird, Suzie. People have such different opinions of her. Dorothy Wallenberg didn’t like her because she didn’t clean very well—“
    “Dorothy said that? The woman who had the patio party and didn’t notice there was dog shit under the grill?“
    “—and Robbie Jones thinks she’s wonderful.”
    “Jesus God. You could eat out of Robbie’s toilets! I had a salad there once that tasted sorta funny, and after a while I realized it was soap. When she washes lettuce, she really washes lettuce. And this cleaning woman meets her standards? Have you ever had her clean for you? Edith, I mean?“
    “Yesterday. I felt like you did. She got me down. What’s more—”
    She was interrupted by a cheer from the parents around them as the two teams of little boys ran onto the field. “Cute little bastards, aren’t they?“ Suzie said affectionately.
    After the requisite amount of fumbling around, the game got under way. Todd’s team, which Suzie’s son Bob was on as well, was in red and white, and were as crisp and noisy as firecrackers as they went to bat. There were a great many balls called and walks made and steals attempted, but at the end of the inning, only one run scored. Jane stayed on, thoroughly enjoying Suzie’s vulgar commentary on the game, the parents, and life in general.
    At the bottom half of the third inning, one kid on the other team made a long, high drive. The entire outfield ran for it, all looking up. A collision was inevitable. Three of them crashed together behind second base. The