I, Spy? (Sophie Green Mysteries, No. 1) (Sophie Green Mystery)

me.”
    “Nope. Some women get off on that sort of thing. Men, too.”
    “But it has water in it,” Eazy said in her own defense. “The thing has water. What’s a dildo doing with water in it like a squirt gun?”
    The sales clerk recovered it from the middle of the rack where Eazy had dropped it and pushed a button, turning it on.
    “See?” She held it up for them all to see. “Bubbles.”
    “But whose gonna watch it?” Eazy asked with a perplexed frown. “I mean, it goes…well, you know.”
    “Sometimes there’s a man down there, honey,” the clerk said, unblinkingly. “And the bubbles are there for a reason, for her pleasure. Makes the thing throb very gently, not like someone hammering you.”
    Eazy still wasn’t satisfied. “Where do the bubbles go?”
    The clerk sighed impatiently and explained. “They don’t go anywhere—they are regenerated by the battery. Bubbles equal satisfaction. Like a hot tub for your pussy.”
    By the time they’d all recovered, they were only halfway through with their shopping. Each of them found the one they wanted, along with either a bottle or tube of flavored lotion or gel, a video or two, and even a deck of playing cards.
    “Another fantasy of yours?” Ann asked Eazy, eyeing the black Eager Beaver contraption she’d selected as they prepared to pay for their purchases.
    “Hey, this is as close as I’ll ever get, so why not?” she reasoned. “Besides, the only other one they had this size was purple. That would be just too weird for me.”
    Ann was thrilled that the shopping trip had turned out to be so much fun, and even though she was starting to feel a little tired, she knew that she had to make it through the rest of this night.
    “What’s next?” Merry asked, once they were settled back into Eazy’s Cadillac.
    Ann reached into her purse and pulled out the slips of paper she’d brought with her. Closing her eyes like some swami or fortuneteller, she chose one.
    “This must be Leta Lou’s,” Ann said. “Looks like the next thing we’re all doing is getting tattoos!”

I, Spy?
     
     
     
     
    Kate Johnson
     
     
     
     
    Never underestimate the blonde.
     
    “The British spy is elegant, suave and sophisticated. The British spy is not blonde, built and confused.”
    But Sophie Green is, and she’s just been hired by a highly secret government agency. She drives a car the colour of bile and is obsessed with Buffy the Vampire Slayer . She doesn’t know which end of the gun to fire from and her hair hasn’t been natural since she was twelve. But that’s not going to stop her from trying to save the day, once she figures out who to save it from.
    Sexy spies, plane crashes, firebombs and multicoloured cocktails—they’re all in a day’s work for Sophie. Roll over, Bond, there’s a new bombshell in town. And it’s got Sophie’s name on it…
     
    Warning: This title contains guns, swearing, dark thoughts about cheerful people, incomprehensible Britishisms, and painful sarcasm.

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    This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the writer’s imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locale or organizations is entirely coincidental.
     
    Samhain Publishing, Ltd.
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    I, Spy?
    Copyright © 2007 by Kate Johnson
    ISBN: 978-1-59998-434-6
    Edited by Jessica Bimberg
    Cover by Scott Carpenter
     
    All Rights Are Reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
     
    First Samhain Publishing, Ltd. electronic publication: March 2007
    www.samhainpublishing.com