In Bed With Lord Byron

lovely.’
    I looked into her eyes and realised that though she hadn’t got the gist of the conversation, she was no fool; she sensed my feelings, she saw the undercurrents flashing beneath the words
like lightning. I smiled at her, feeling a warmth between us.
    ‘Thank you,’ I said gratefully.
    The conversation swept on, but I still felt stung and embarrassed by my faux pas and I had lost the confidence to shine. I think that was why I did what I did next; why I behaved so dreadfully.
Or perhaps it was the fury in my heart, the anguish that Anthony and I were never going to be friends again, and feeling that probably I had never meant anything to him.
    It all started when Mrs Prendeghast confided in me that she was embarking on a new career as a sex therapist.
    ‘My husband was rather nervous at first, as you can imagine,’ she crowed, ‘but I said to him, it’s the twenty-first century!
Everyone
has a sex therapist these
days – it’s more usual to have one than a dentist or a personal trainer!’
    ‘So if Anthony and Kerry ever encounter any problems in the bedroom, you’ll be able to sort them right out,’ I said cheerfully.
    Kerry, Morrison and Anthony immediately shot me that’s-dangerous-territory-Lucy looks. But Mrs Prendeghast was delighted to be on her favourite subject.
    ‘Oh, absolutely,’ she cried. ‘I remember that Kerry’s first boyfriend, Damien, was a terribly lecherous young man—’
    ‘Mom, you are so embarrassing.’ Kerry cut in, covering her face with the dessert menu. ‘You can’t say this stuff, not in front of Anthony. He’s British.’
    ‘Oh, I’m sure Anthony’s fine. Though you did mention earlier that for the last few days . . .’
    Everyone sat up, ears pricked.
    ‘Mom, Anthony’s been tired,’ Kerry interjected, a note of panic in her voice.
    ‘Jet-lag,’ Anthony said quickly.
    I couldn’t stop myself. ‘I think Kerry and Anthony should share everything – we’re all friends and close family.’
    ‘
Exactly!
’ Mrs Prendeghast said. ‘See, Lucy’s British and she’s not a prude! Kerry, you don’t need to be embarrassed, sex is an everyday topic of
conversation – like weather, like gardening – and there is nothing wrong with not being able to get it—’
    ‘I think it’s time for desserts,’ Mr Prendeghast interjected loudly. ‘I don’t know about you, but I’d quite like the pistachio ice cream.’
    For a moment we all pretended to be staring hard at our menus. I reined in a wild, hysterical desire to laugh. I felt glad and naughty and awful all at once. I didn’t dare look at
Anthony.
    ‘But,’ said Grandma Rose, ‘what was Virginia saying about Anthony not being able to get something?’
    ‘It’s nothing, Grandma,’ Morrison said.
    ‘But I want to know what she was saying,’ Grandma Rose wailed. ‘Just because I’m old and I can’t hear, nobody thinks I’m interested in anything, but I
am.’
    ‘Oh, we know that all too well,’ said Mr Prendeghast under his breath.
    Ignoring Anthony’s absolutely thunderous glance, I leaned over and whispered in Grandma Rose’s ear. She went pink and then said, ‘Oh, oh!’ in a small, high voice, and
then went back to perusing her dessert menu. A tiny smile tickled the corners of her crimped lips. Then she let out a giggle. And it was such a funny sight, seeing this elderly woman trying not to
laugh like a naughty schoolgirl, that I exploded into laughter, which set her off too.
    ‘What’s so funny?’ Mrs Prendeghast asked, rather oblivious to the chain of humour and humiliation she had set off.
    ‘So, have you shown Lucy her bridesmaid dress yet?’ said Mr Prendeghast.
    And then, thank goodness, the subject had changed, and Grandma Rose and I managed to stop giggling. However, a newfound warmth had formed between us, a camaraderie that transcended our age gap.
I felt glad of it, because I was aware that I was behaving appallingly. I could feel Kerry’s quiet rage and Anthony’s seething astonishment. And worse, I was scared of how naked I had
been for a moment: after all, why else would I behave so dreadfully if I didn’t care so deeply for Anthony?
    The conversation continued on the subject of the wedding preparations. Kerry shook off her irritation and blossomed again, raving happily about her dress and the bridesmaids’ outfits and
the food and the placements. Anthony, meanwhile, remained fairly quiet. I didn’t dare look him in the eye.
    ‘Will you be