Losing Hope

blurts out. “I know about the guy you beat up. I know about you being sent to juvi. I know that in the two days I’ve known you, you’ve scared the shit out of me at least three times. And since we’re being honest, I also know that if you’ve been asking around about me, then you’ve probably heard about my reputation, which is more than likely the only reason you’re even making an effort with me. I hate to disappoint you, but I’m not screwing you. I don’t want you thinking anything will happen between us besides what’s already happening. We run together. That’s it.”
    Wow.
    I was expecting her to hear the rumors about me, but I wasn’t expecting her to think I believe the rumors about her. So that’s why her guard is up? Because she thinks I heard the rumors and now I’m just trying to screw her?
    I mean, don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying the thought hasn’t crossed my mind. But Jesus , not like that . The fact that she even feels this way only makes me want to hug her. The thought of anyone intentionally trying to get close to her for that sole reason pisses me off. It doesn’t help matters that Grayson is standing next to her now.
    Where the hell did he come from? And why the hell does he have his arm around her like he owns her?
    “Holder,” Grayson says. “Didn’t know you were coming back.”
    They’re the first words he’s spoken directly to me since the night before Les died. I’m afraid if I look at him I’ll lose it, so I keep my eyes trained hard on Sky’s. Unfortunately, my eyes can’t seem to stop looking at the hand that’s still gripping her waist. The hand that Sky hasn’t slapped away. The hand that has obviously been around that same waist before. The same hand that used to be around Les.
    This entire situation is too ironic. So much so, I crack a smile. Just my luck.
    I straighten up and keep my eyes locked on the hand around Sky’s waist. “Well, I’m back,” I say. I can’t watch this for another second. That familiar feeling of wanting to rip his fucking hand off has returned tenfold.
    I walk away and make it a few feet down the hall before I turn around and face Sky again. “Track tryouts are Thursday after school. Go.”
    I don’t wait for her response. I walk to my locker and exchange books, then head to my next class. I don’t know why, though. I’m pretty sure I won’t be coming back tomorrow.
    • • •
    “Hey, dickweed. What’s this sudden infatuation with Sky?” Daniel asks as we make our way toward the cafeteria.
    “It’s nothing,” I say, attempting to brush it off. “I met her yesterday and was just curious about her. But apparently she’s with Grayson, so . . . whatever.”
    Daniel raises an eyebrow, but says nothing about the Grayson comment. He pushes through the cafeteria doors and we walk to our table. I take a seat and scan the crowd, searching for her.
    “You gonna eat today?” he asks.
    I shake my head. “Nah. I don’t really feel like it.” I lost my appetite this morning as soon as Grayson’s arm went around Sky’s waist.
    Daniel shrugs and walks away to get himself food. I search the cafeteria a while longer and finally spot her a few tables down, sitting with a guy. He’s not Grayson, though. I scan the crowd for Grayson and find him seated at a table on the opposite end of the cafeteria. They’re not sitting together. Why wouldn’t they sit together if they’re dating? And if they’re not dating, why would he be touching her like he was?
    “I got you a water,” Daniel says, sliding it across the table to me.
    “Thanks.”
    He sets his tray down and takes a seat across from me. “Why are you being such a cunt nugget?”
    Water spews out of my mouth and I drop my arms onto the table and laugh, wiping my mouth. “ Cunt nugget? ”
    He nods and pops the lid on his soda. “Something’s off with you. You stared at that girl the entire time I was in line for food. You won’t tell me anything about her. You’ve been on edge since you got here this morning and it has nothing to do with the fact that it’s your first day back at school since . . . well . . . since your last day at school. And you haven’t even commented about how no one seems to give a shit that you’re even here today. Aren’t you a little excited everyone has stopped with the gossip?”
    I would be excited if I was convinced the gossip had stopped. But it hasn’t stopped, it’s just been shifted in a different