Love is Always Write Anthology Volume 6

suffering, and that it is entirely my fault.
    "Why could I not just have left him alone?" I whisper into the quiet wagon, praying that he does not feel much pain, unable to help myself as my tears fall.
    CHAPTER 4
    Thomas
    Something is not right. I cannot see nor hear a thing and my head feels like it weighs a thousand pounds. I cannot tell if I am alive or dead, as I am unable to move any of my body. I am terrified, but not for me, for Nico. How much is he suffering now? I have not known these people my whole life like he has, and I fear they will take swift action where he is concerned. I remember seeing the look of disgust on his father's face right before that neanderthal Sergei threw something into my eyes. Everything happened so quickly after that. Before I could do anything, I felt the noose around my neck cutting off my yells and air supply. Then my head felt like it was splitting open while everything went dark, just like it is now. It is as if I am in a cave with no light of any kind.
    My sense of smell seems to be working though. There is hay and horses, as well as leather and sawdust, the pungent smell of manure and also of Sergei. I would know that stench from anywhere even though at the moment it is distant. Suddenly it becomes very clear to me why my sense of smell is so strong.
    I am in my lion form, that bastard Sergei has forced my shift! No doubt the rope was laced with silver and wolf's bane; not enough to kill but just enough to cause the transformation. If I lay still and concentrate, I should be able to shift back, and then I will kill the son of a bitch with my bare hands.
    "There is no sense in wearing yourself out trying to shift, pansy boy. I am afraid it will do you no good. Queen Elena in all her infinite wisdom has cursed a collar just for you. Hope you like staying in your lion for the rest of your days."
    His maniacal laugh makes me shudder with repulsion; it is not the sound of a sane person. But at least my sense of hearing has returned. If only I could shout at him, it might give me some comfort but I am unable to in this form. So I will wait. He will have to let me out sooner or later and when he does, he is a dead man.
    I now fear for Nico more than ever. My gentle man surely will not be able to maintain a life living solely as the lion.
    Romany shifters are more human than animal; we can only survive for so long as our other side before we succumb to the illness of animals. Knowing my hands are tied, metaphorically speaking, I close my eyes to rest for a while.
    I know time has passed since Sergei was here last. My sight has returned so I can make out the darkness outside. Since the animals are all in their pens, the last performance has long been over; which means I must have fallen asleep at some point. To stretch my weary muscles, I move to stand up, but I find I am shackled to the floor with chains from every one of my paws. Sighing in resignation, I throw my head down upon the ground. I pray this ends quickly and that is when I sense him.
    Nicolai.
    He is nearby. My heart begins to race; dare I hope they let him go? I cannot see him yet, but I know he is getting closer and he is in his human form, thank the gods!
    I can sense no one else is here in the barn. I think Nico must have escaped and my fear for him is tenfold. I want to scream at him to go back because I know Sergei will return soon, but I cannot and it frustrates me. I dare not growl, for fear I will be heard by someone who could be walking by outside, so I just lay quietly where I am.
    Suddenly I can feel his hands upon my neck. He has reached for me from between the bars of my prison.
    "I am so sorry my love, had I been honest with you none of this would have happened." He whispers to me as if he thinks I am sleeping.
    I want to tell him that it is not his fault but once again I am unable. His hands stroking in my fur soothe me like a balm to my soul. He suddenly stops so I turn around to let him know I am awake. It surprises him at first then his face becomes stern, his eyebrows set in a frown, his teeth biting on the bottom of his lip like he has something to tell me. Yet before he can speak, I sense Sergei and I know Nico must leave quickly. I growl low in my throat twisting my head back to look towards the door, but he just stands there. Now I am really worried. If he does not leave now there is no telling what will happen to him. So again I growl and knock my head against the bars which startles him. Then I